fixing typos
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@ -13,7 +13,7 @@ Our Method, which I shall refer to as EASYPEASY doesn't work that way. Some of t
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There is a common misapprehension that we choose to watch porn. PMO addicts ( yes addicts) no more choose to do that than alcoholics choose to become alcoholics, or heroin addicts choose to become heroin addicts. It is true that we choose to boot up the laptop, fire up the browser and visit our favourite online harem[^1] tube sites. I occasionally choose to go to the cinema, but I certainly didn't choose to spend my whole life in the cinema theatre. The curiosity and my nature took me there but I would not have done that if I had known it would addict me and cause me my health, happiness and relationships. Only if I had heard about PIED on my first visit to that porn site?
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Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn't enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn't concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day ? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem ?
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Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn't enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn't concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem?
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Like every other PMOer, you have been lured into the most sinister subtle trap that man and nature have combined to devise. There is not a parent, brother, sister on this planet, whether they be PMOer themselves or not, that likes the thought of their children using porn and PMO to cope and for pleasure. This means that all PMOers wish they had never started. Not surprising really, no one needs porn to enjoy life or cope with stress before they get hooked.
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@ -22,7 +22,7 @@ The whole business of porn is an extraordinary enigma. One of the reasons we get
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We also spend the rest of our lives feeling hopeless and miserable. Time spent on porn can accumulate to a large percentage of our life in this planet! What do we do with that amount of time spent? We ‘educate’ ourselves with supranormal[^1] ‘material’ that makes us stupidly prefer and childishly long for these cold images - even when warm real ones are available. By the constant surge and drop of dopamine induced by PMO, we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of irritability, anger, frustration, stress, fatigue[^3], PIED, hypofrontality etc. In short, it is a lifetime of slavery. It is logically and intuitively clear that amative sex (physical touch, feel, voice etc.) is the best part of sex and is even better (if Karezza[^2] is practised, although not necessary for the current purposes) than the propagative (orgasm) part, except when children are desired. So, when we use porn in the absence of the best part of sex we feel miserable and guilty.
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In fact, all the reading about internet pornography's addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn't have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren't, and when you are not doing it you crave for it ? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.
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In fact, all the reading about internet pornography's addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn't have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren't, and when you are not doing it you crave for it? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.
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The PMOer despises himself, every time he has an unreliable erection, a fading penetration, reading about PIED and other stuff on the YBOP forum, every time he could not pull himself up to exercise after a daytime PMO, every PMO behind his or her trustfully asleep partner’s back, every time he sees his tired face and lifeless eyes in the restroom mirror.
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@ -37,11 +37,11 @@ stressing chemicals are not absorbed by our brains.
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The real problem is trying to explain not only why PMOers find it difficult to stop but why anybody does it at all after knowing about brain neuroplasticity. You are probably thinking: “That's all very well. I know this, but once you are hooked on these things it is very difficult to stop.” But why is it so difficult, and why do we have to do it? Addicts of PMO search for the answer to these questions all of their lives. Some say it is because of the powerful withdrawal symptoms. In fact, the actual withdrawal symptoms from porn are so mild (see Chapter 6) that PMOers should know about smokers who have lived and died without ever realizing they are drug addicts.
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Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre ? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.
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Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.
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Enjoyment has nothing to do with it. I enjoy lobster but I never got to the stage where I had to have lobsters everyday and multiple times like they are hanging round my neck. With other things in life we enjoy them whilst we are doing them but we don't sit feeling deprived when we are not. Some search for deep psychological reasons, the “Freudian Syndrome,” or “the child at the mother's breast.” Really it is just the reverse.
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The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you ?
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The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you?
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Some say:
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* “It is educational!” So, when is your graduation?
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@ -110,7 +110,7 @@ Through a process of natural selection over thousand of years, our minds and bod
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When we took a ‘peep’ at internet porn the first time, a few images were titillating but most were disgusting, causing you to avert your eyes away. Like you would if had accidentally glanced a feeding mother’s breast. And some of us are even revolted with what they saw when the star reminded them of someone dear to their heart or a scene which recalled their own instance of being the victim. Some don’t feel like it to browse and masturbate at the same time. It may be hard to believe for you but the non-PMOs, who don’t PMO after their first time, are the lucky ones. They actually decided that it was not their cup of tea. It must be hard for you to believe but stay with me.
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How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not ? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That's all.
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How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That's all.
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{{% center %}}
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### **Are PMOers Mentally Weak?**
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@ -33,7 +33,7 @@ Because many of us started out our first sexual experience that ended in an orga
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## **Women And Porn**
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{{% /center %}}
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The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn't dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn ? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.
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The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn't dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.
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Porn and internet porn does not help your sex life; it destroys it totally. Having to hide your internet footprints, trying to delete your history, fearing accidental exposure to your boyfriend or kids, body pains, doubtful symptoms, fighting self doubts, arguing with yourself about your responsibilities in the ill effects of your addiction... well, why do you want to put yourself in such a bad situation?
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@ -77,7 +77,7 @@ I can understand why the ED and the risks of ruining one’s mental health didn'
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However, I do believe that if I could have seen what was happening inside my brain, this would have helped me to quit. Now I'm not referring to the shock technique of showing a PMOer the effect of the hidden attribute of internet porn on the reward circuit of the brain. It was obvious to me from my unreliable arousals, fading penetrations, lack of energy, unemotional sex (as in just a muscle twitch), hit-seek escalations of porn search for novelty and shock that something is not going right. None of these are catastrophic for me as I have trained myself in cognitive behavioural techniques as discussed before but I did experience them quite often enough. Practising CBT/REBT gave me enough grounding and stability to look at my addiction in a different and better way than I’d have if I were not aware of the cognitive biases. Provided I kept functioning, even at a mediocre level, they were less of an embarrassment than a lost tooth - at least nobody could see my mind.
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What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don't like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice ? That's what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.
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What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don't like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice? That's what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.
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Many researchers and doctors are now relating various mental health problems in addition to the physiological ones caused by internet porn and PMO in general. This is no surprise to me. The mainstream medical world has laboured that PMO has never been scientifically proven to be the direct cause of the issues reported by self-confessing individuals. Admitting one’s sexual inability in public is such a shame triggering event, why would anyone do that unless they are really concerned? And probably many have found the cause and have eliminated it. This book is going to help you to get rid of it and also become a happy ex PMOer. No porn whatsoever, no porn aided masturbation. And of course no unnecessary orgasms. The only aid will be the touch, smell and voice of your partner. Like whole wheat bread after a well developed appetite, you will produce enough juices to break down the hard bread and it comes as a beautiful refreshment. No high fructose corn syrup injected fake food. The evidence is so overwhelming as not to need proof. No one ever scientifically proved to me exactly why, when I bang my thumb with a hammer, it hurts. I soon got the message.
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@ -18,4 +18,4 @@ Once that little monster leaves your body the awful feeling of insecurity ends.
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As I have said, the ‘compartment’ myth is due to one of many tricks that the little monster plays with your mind. In fact, these tricks do not make it easier to stop, they make it harder. The PMOer is therefore left with a permanent hunger that he can never satisfy. This is why many PMOers turn to cigarettes, heavy drinking or even harder drugs in order to satisfy the void.
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I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster ? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.
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I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.
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@ -829,7 +829,7 @@ when you were a PMOer. Just think, how can you possibly cure an addict of addict
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</ol>
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<p>Once that little monster leaves your body the awful feeling of insecurity ends. Your confidence returns, together with a marvellous feeling of self-respect. You obtain the assurance to take control of your life, not only in your other habits but also in all other ways. This is one of the many great advantages of being free from any addiction.</p>
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<p>As I have said, the ‘compartment’ myth is due to one of many tricks that the little monster plays with your mind. In fact, these tricks do not make it easier to stop, they make it harder. The PMOer is therefore left with a permanent hunger that he can never satisfy. This is why many PMOers turn to cigarettes, heavy drinking or even harder drugs in order to satisfy the void.</p>
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<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster ? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
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<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
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</description>
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</item>
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@ -1296,7 +1296,7 @@ Get out of the habit of envying PMOers and start seeing them as the miserable, p
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</blockquote>
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<p>I can understand why the ED and the risks of ruining one’s mental health didn&rsquo;t help me to quit. I could cope with the former and block my mind to the latter. As you are already aware, my method is not to frighten you into quitting but the complete opposite - to make you realize just how more enjoyable your life will be when you have escaped.</p>
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<p>However, I do believe that if I could have seen what was happening inside my brain, this would have helped me to quit. Now I&rsquo;m not referring to the shock technique of showing a PMOer the effect of the hidden attribute of internet porn on the reward circuit of the brain. It was obvious to me from my unreliable arousals, fading penetrations, lack of energy, unemotional sex (as in just a muscle twitch), hit-seek escalations of porn search for novelty and shock that something is not going right. None of these are catastrophic for me as I have trained myself in cognitive behavioural techniques as discussed before but I did experience them quite often enough. Practising CBT/REBT gave me enough grounding and stability to look at my addiction in a different and better way than I’d have if I were not aware of the cognitive biases. Provided I kept functioning, even at a mediocre level, they were less of an embarrassment than a lost tooth - at least nobody could see my mind.</p>
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<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice ? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
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<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
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<p>Many researchers and doctors are now relating various mental health problems in addition to the physiological ones caused by internet porn and PMO in general. This is no surprise to me. The mainstream medical world has laboured that PMO has never been scientifically proven to be the direct cause of the issues reported by self-confessing individuals. Admitting one’s sexual inability in public is such a shame triggering event, why would anyone do that unless they are really concerned? And probably many have found the cause and have eliminated it. This book is going to help you to get rid of it and also become a happy ex PMOer. No porn whatsoever, no porn aided masturbation. And of course no unnecessary orgasms. The only aid will be the touch, smell and voice of your partner. Like whole wheat bread after a well developed appetite, you will produce enough juices to break down the hard bread and it comes as a beautiful refreshment. No high fructose corn syrup injected fake food. The evidence is so overwhelming as not to need proof. No one ever scientifically proved to me exactly why, when I bang my thumb with a hammer, it hurts. I soon got the message.</p>
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<p>I must emphasize that I am not a doctor but just like the hammer and the thumb, it soon became obvious to me that the periods of my life outside of sex that were marked by low levels of irritation tolerance, lack of energy, temper, moody thoughts, zoning out of social scenes etc. were directly related to my masturbation and especially the supernormal stimulus of IP<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup>. However, I truly believe that the greatest hazard that IP causes to our health is the gradual and progressive deterioration of our sex life caused by super-substitutes. The novelty, shock, variety in size and nature of internet porn can slowly take away the magic of the real sex. Worse, the RC<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup> reward circuits are flooding unnaturally and at high abnormal levels so that they close up the receptors and also diminish any potency and effectiveness of normal de-stressors that work in the RC. This predisposes one to be depressed and become needy to lot more other ‘crutches’ of life such as cigarettes and alcohol or even causing the host to think of committing suicide. Even the real vagina will not be a match for the death grip of masturbation - and the little monster is kept alive.</p>
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<p>Our lives are ‘blessed’ with challenges – yes, ‘blessed’- they are needed to keep us strong and make us better. If our nervous systems is pre-disposed to making a molehill out of a mountain it will seek a ‘fix. When it seeks a hit or a mountain out of a molehill when it interfaces with reality then is it worth it? Our body and our brain is designed to make use of optimal levels of these brain chemicals. I don’t think a man who fails in satisfying a woman should consider himself worthless.</p>
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@ -1423,7 +1423,7 @@ pleasure.”</em></p>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
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<h2 id="women-and-porn"><strong>Women And Porn</strong></h2>
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</div>
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<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn ? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
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<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
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<p>Porn and internet porn does not help your sex life; it destroys it totally. Having to hide your internet footprints, trying to delete your history, fearing accidental exposure to your boyfriend or kids, body pains, doubtful symptoms, fighting self doubts, arguing with yourself about your responsibilities in the ill effects of your addiction&hellip; well, why do you want to put yourself in such a bad situation?</p>
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<p>Not only is there nothing to give up but there are marvellous positive gains to be had. When PMOers contemplate quitting they tend to concentrate on health and virility. These are obviously valid and important issues but I personally believe the greatest gains from stopping are psychological:</p>
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<ol>
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</div>
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<p>Through a process of natural selection over thousand of years, our minds and bodies have developed techniques for rewarding actions that multiply and sustain humanity. Yet our minds and bodies are not ready for the supernormal stimulus that is bigger, brighter, colourful, edgier and more shocking than the one we have now. We are attracted proportional to the degree of how far the outlier is from our individual normal. It can be two dimensional clip - and a muted one at that - we will get aroused. Look at the same clip again and again and you won’t be. You just moved your red line close to the outlier and in no time you will enclose it in your normal consciousness. It is natural and it is so that you can multiply and grow this human race. In real life there are checks and balances in place so you take a break and go away do something else. With internet porn you there are no such checks and balances and you are living in a virtual harem!</p>
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<p>When we took a ‘peep’ at internet porn the first time, a few images were titillating but most were disgusting, causing you to avert your eyes away. Like you would if had accidentally glanced a feeding mother’s breast. And some of us are even revolted with what they saw when the star reminded them of someone dear to their heart or a scene which recalled their own instance of being the victim. Some don’t feel like it to browse and masturbate at the same time. It may be hard to believe for you but the non-PMOs, who don’t PMO after their first time, are the lucky ones. They actually decided that it was not their cup of tea. It must be hard for you to believe but stay with me.</p>
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<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not ? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
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<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
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<h3 id="are-pmoers-mentally-weak"><strong>Are PMOers Mentally Weak?</strong></h3>
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</div>
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<p>As I said previously, the problem is not explaining why it is easy to stop; it is explaining why it is difficult. In fact, the real problem is explaining scientifically why anybody does it even after getting the insights on the neurological damages of addictions not limited to porn.</p>
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<p>The whole business of porn is an extraordinary enigma. One of the reasons we get on to it is because of the thousands of people are already into it, about 35% of the population approximately. Yet every one of them wishes he or she had not started in the first place, telling us that life is like driving in second gear. We cannot quite believe they are not enjoying it. We associate it with freedom or being “sex-educated” and work hard to become hooked ourselves. We then spend the rest of our lives telling others not to do it and trying to kick the habit ourselves.</p>
|
||||
<p>We also spend the rest of our lives feeling hopeless and miserable. Time spent on porn can accumulate to a large percentage of our life in this planet! What do we do with that amount of time spent? We ‘educate’ ourselves with supranormal<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> ‘material’ that makes us stupidly prefer and childishly long for these cold images - even when warm real ones are available. By the constant surge and drop of dopamine induced by PMO, we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of irritability, anger, frustration, stress, fatigue<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup>, PIED, hypofrontality etc. In short, it is a lifetime of slavery. It is logically and intuitively clear that amative sex (physical touch, feel, voice etc.) is the best part of sex and is even better (if Karezza<sup id="fnref:3"><a href="#fn:3" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">3</a></sup> is practised, although not necessary for the current purposes) than the propagative (orgasm) part, except when children are desired. So, when we use porn in the absence of the best part of sex we feel miserable and guilty.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it ? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>The PMOer despises himself, every time he has an unreliable erection, a fading penetration, reading about PIED and other stuff on the YBOP forum, every time he could not pull himself up to exercise after a daytime PMO, every PMO behind his or her trustfully asleep partner’s back, every time he sees his tired face and lifeless eyes in the restroom mirror.</p>
|
||||
<p>Having to go through life with these awful black shadows at the back of his mind, what does he get out of it? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Pleasure? Enjoyment? Relaxation? A prop? A boost? All illusions, unless you consider the wearing of tight shoes to enjoy the removal of them as some sort of pleasure!</p>
|
||||
<p>The real problem is trying to explain not only why PMOers find it difficult to stop but why anybody does it at all after knowing about brain neuroplasticity. You are probably thinking: “That&rsquo;s all very well. I know this, but once you are hooked on these things it is very difficult to stop.” But why is it so difficult, and why do we have to do it? Addicts of PMO search for the answer to these questions all of their lives. Some say it is because of the powerful withdrawal symptoms. In fact, the actual withdrawal symptoms from porn are so mild (see Chapter 6) that PMOers should know about smokers who have lived and died without ever realizing they are drug addicts.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre ? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Enjoyment has nothing to do with it. I enjoy lobster but I never got to the stage where I had to have lobsters everyday and multiple times like they are hanging round my neck. With other things in life we enjoy them whilst we are doing them but we don&rsquo;t sit feeling deprived when we are not. Some search for deep psychological reasons, the “Freudian Syndrome,” or “the child at the mother&rsquo;s breast.” Really it is just the reverse.</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you ?</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you?</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say:</p>
|
||||
<ul>
|
||||
<li>“It is educational!” So, when is your graduation?</li>
|
||||
|
|
@ -2068,7 +2068,7 @@ the world would also see the light and adopt my method.</li>
|
|||
<p>If you are expecting me to inform you of the terrible health issues that PMO addicts risk, that they are susceptible to be affected by PIED (porn induced erectile disfunction), unreliable arousals, fading penetration, loss of interest in real partners,loss of control over themselves, loss of relationships, that it is a filthy, disgusting habit and that <em>YOU</em> are a stupid, spineless, weak-willed jellyfish, then I must disappoint you. Those tactics never helped me to quit and if they were going to help you, you would already have quit.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our Method, which I shall refer to as EASYPEASY doesn&rsquo;t work that way. Some of the things that I am about to say, you might find difficult to believe. However by the time you&rsquo;ve finished reading the book, you&rsquo;ll not only believe them, but wonder how you could ever have been brainwashed into believing otherwise.</p>
|
||||
<p>There is a common misapprehension that we choose to watch porn. PMO addicts ( yes addicts) no more choose to do that than alcoholics choose to become alcoholics, or heroin addicts choose to become heroin addicts. It is true that we choose to boot up the laptop, fire up the browser and visit our favourite online harem<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> tube sites. I occasionally choose to go to the cinema, but I certainly didn&rsquo;t choose to spend my whole life in the cinema theatre. The curiosity and my nature took me there but I would not have done that if I had known it would addict me and cause me my health, happiness and relationships. Only if I had heard about PIED on my first visit to that porn site?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day ? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem ?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem?</p>
|
||||
<p>Like every other PMOer, you have been lured into the most sinister subtle trap that man and nature have combined to devise. There is not a parent, brother, sister on this planet, whether they be PMOer themselves or not, that likes the thought of their children using porn and PMO to cope and for pleasure. This means that all PMOers wish they had never started. Not surprising really, no one needs porn to enjoy life or cope with stress before they get hooked.</p>
|
||||
<p>At the same time all PMOers wish to continue to PMO. After all, no one forces us to turn on the incognito mode of the browser, whether we understand the reason or not, it is only PMOers themselves that decide to knock on the doors of the online harems.</p>
|
||||
<p>If there were a magic button that the PMOers could press to wake up the following morning as if they never accessed their very first tube site&hellip;. the only PMO addicts there would be tomorrow morning would be the youngsters who are still at the experimental stage. The only thing that prevents us from quitting is: FEAR!</p>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -828,7 +828,7 @@ when you were a PMOer. Just think, how can you possibly cure an addict of addict
|
|||
</ol>
|
||||
<p>Once that little monster leaves your body the awful feeling of insecurity ends. Your confidence returns, together with a marvellous feeling of self-respect. You obtain the assurance to take control of your life, not only in your other habits but also in all other ways. This is one of the many great advantages of being free from any addiction.</p>
|
||||
<p>As I have said, the ‘compartment’ myth is due to one of many tricks that the little monster plays with your mind. In fact, these tricks do not make it easier to stop, they make it harder. The PMOer is therefore left with a permanent hunger that he can never satisfy. This is why many PMOers turn to cigarettes, heavy drinking or even harder drugs in order to satisfy the void.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster ? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
</description>
|
||||
</item>
|
||||
|
||||
|
|
@ -1295,7 +1295,7 @@ Get out of the habit of envying PMOers and start seeing them as the miserable, p
|
|||
</blockquote>
|
||||
<p>I can understand why the ED and the risks of ruining one’s mental health didn&rsquo;t help me to quit. I could cope with the former and block my mind to the latter. As you are already aware, my method is not to frighten you into quitting but the complete opposite - to make you realize just how more enjoyable your life will be when you have escaped.</p>
|
||||
<p>However, I do believe that if I could have seen what was happening inside my brain, this would have helped me to quit. Now I&rsquo;m not referring to the shock technique of showing a PMOer the effect of the hidden attribute of internet porn on the reward circuit of the brain. It was obvious to me from my unreliable arousals, fading penetrations, lack of energy, unemotional sex (as in just a muscle twitch), hit-seek escalations of porn search for novelty and shock that something is not going right. None of these are catastrophic for me as I have trained myself in cognitive behavioural techniques as discussed before but I did experience them quite often enough. Practising CBT/REBT gave me enough grounding and stability to look at my addiction in a different and better way than I’d have if I were not aware of the cognitive biases. Provided I kept functioning, even at a mediocre level, they were less of an embarrassment than a lost tooth - at least nobody could see my mind.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice ? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>Many researchers and doctors are now relating various mental health problems in addition to the physiological ones caused by internet porn and PMO in general. This is no surprise to me. The mainstream medical world has laboured that PMO has never been scientifically proven to be the direct cause of the issues reported by self-confessing individuals. Admitting one’s sexual inability in public is such a shame triggering event, why would anyone do that unless they are really concerned? And probably many have found the cause and have eliminated it. This book is going to help you to get rid of it and also become a happy ex PMOer. No porn whatsoever, no porn aided masturbation. And of course no unnecessary orgasms. The only aid will be the touch, smell and voice of your partner. Like whole wheat bread after a well developed appetite, you will produce enough juices to break down the hard bread and it comes as a beautiful refreshment. No high fructose corn syrup injected fake food. The evidence is so overwhelming as not to need proof. No one ever scientifically proved to me exactly why, when I bang my thumb with a hammer, it hurts. I soon got the message.</p>
|
||||
<p>I must emphasize that I am not a doctor but just like the hammer and the thumb, it soon became obvious to me that the periods of my life outside of sex that were marked by low levels of irritation tolerance, lack of energy, temper, moody thoughts, zoning out of social scenes etc. were directly related to my masturbation and especially the supernormal stimulus of IP<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup>. However, I truly believe that the greatest hazard that IP causes to our health is the gradual and progressive deterioration of our sex life caused by super-substitutes. The novelty, shock, variety in size and nature of internet porn can slowly take away the magic of the real sex. Worse, the RC<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup> reward circuits are flooding unnaturally and at high abnormal levels so that they close up the receptors and also diminish any potency and effectiveness of normal de-stressors that work in the RC. This predisposes one to be depressed and become needy to lot more other ‘crutches’ of life such as cigarettes and alcohol or even causing the host to think of committing suicide. Even the real vagina will not be a match for the death grip of masturbation - and the little monster is kept alive.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our lives are ‘blessed’ with challenges – yes, ‘blessed’- they are needed to keep us strong and make us better. If our nervous systems is pre-disposed to making a molehill out of a mountain it will seek a ‘fix. When it seeks a hit or a mountain out of a molehill when it interfaces with reality then is it worth it? Our body and our brain is designed to make use of optimal levels of these brain chemicals. I don’t think a man who fails in satisfying a woman should consider himself worthless.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1422,7 +1422,7 @@ pleasure.”</em></p>
|
|||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h2 id="women-and-porn"><strong>Women And Porn</strong></h2>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn ? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>Porn and internet porn does not help your sex life; it destroys it totally. Having to hide your internet footprints, trying to delete your history, fearing accidental exposure to your boyfriend or kids, body pains, doubtful symptoms, fighting self doubts, arguing with yourself about your responsibilities in the ill effects of your addiction&hellip; well, why do you want to put yourself in such a bad situation?</p>
|
||||
<p>Not only is there nothing to give up but there are marvellous positive gains to be had. When PMOers contemplate quitting they tend to concentrate on health and virility. These are obviously valid and important issues but I personally believe the greatest gains from stopping are psychological:</p>
|
||||
<ol>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1732,7 +1732,7 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
</div>
|
||||
<p>Through a process of natural selection over thousand of years, our minds and bodies have developed techniques for rewarding actions that multiply and sustain humanity. Yet our minds and bodies are not ready for the supernormal stimulus that is bigger, brighter, colourful, edgier and more shocking than the one we have now. We are attracted proportional to the degree of how far the outlier is from our individual normal. It can be two dimensional clip - and a muted one at that - we will get aroused. Look at the same clip again and again and you won’t be. You just moved your red line close to the outlier and in no time you will enclose it in your normal consciousness. It is natural and it is so that you can multiply and grow this human race. In real life there are checks and balances in place so you take a break and go away do something else. With internet porn you there are no such checks and balances and you are living in a virtual harem!</p>
|
||||
<p>When we took a ‘peep’ at internet porn the first time, a few images were titillating but most were disgusting, causing you to avert your eyes away. Like you would if had accidentally glanced a feeding mother’s breast. And some of us are even revolted with what they saw when the star reminded them of someone dear to their heart or a scene which recalled their own instance of being the victim. Some don’t feel like it to browse and masturbate at the same time. It may be hard to believe for you but the non-PMOs, who don’t PMO after their first time, are the lucky ones. They actually decided that it was not their cup of tea. It must be hard for you to believe but stay with me.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not ? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h3 id="are-pmoers-mentally-weak"><strong>Are PMOers Mentally Weak?</strong></h3>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1830,13 +1830,13 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
<p>As I said previously, the problem is not explaining why it is easy to stop; it is explaining why it is difficult. In fact, the real problem is explaining scientifically why anybody does it even after getting the insights on the neurological damages of addictions not limited to porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The whole business of porn is an extraordinary enigma. One of the reasons we get on to it is because of the thousands of people are already into it, about 35% of the population approximately. Yet every one of them wishes he or she had not started in the first place, telling us that life is like driving in second gear. We cannot quite believe they are not enjoying it. We associate it with freedom or being “sex-educated” and work hard to become hooked ourselves. We then spend the rest of our lives telling others not to do it and trying to kick the habit ourselves.</p>
|
||||
<p>We also spend the rest of our lives feeling hopeless and miserable. Time spent on porn can accumulate to a large percentage of our life in this planet! What do we do with that amount of time spent? We ‘educate’ ourselves with supranormal<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> ‘material’ that makes us stupidly prefer and childishly long for these cold images - even when warm real ones are available. By the constant surge and drop of dopamine induced by PMO, we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of irritability, anger, frustration, stress, fatigue<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup>, PIED, hypofrontality etc. In short, it is a lifetime of slavery. It is logically and intuitively clear that amative sex (physical touch, feel, voice etc.) is the best part of sex and is even better (if Karezza<sup id="fnref:3"><a href="#fn:3" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">3</a></sup> is practised, although not necessary for the current purposes) than the propagative (orgasm) part, except when children are desired. So, when we use porn in the absence of the best part of sex we feel miserable and guilty.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it ? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>The PMOer despises himself, every time he has an unreliable erection, a fading penetration, reading about PIED and other stuff on the YBOP forum, every time he could not pull himself up to exercise after a daytime PMO, every PMO behind his or her trustfully asleep partner’s back, every time he sees his tired face and lifeless eyes in the restroom mirror.</p>
|
||||
<p>Having to go through life with these awful black shadows at the back of his mind, what does he get out of it? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Pleasure? Enjoyment? Relaxation? A prop? A boost? All illusions, unless you consider the wearing of tight shoes to enjoy the removal of them as some sort of pleasure!</p>
|
||||
<p>The real problem is trying to explain not only why PMOers find it difficult to stop but why anybody does it at all after knowing about brain neuroplasticity. You are probably thinking: “That&rsquo;s all very well. I know this, but once you are hooked on these things it is very difficult to stop.” But why is it so difficult, and why do we have to do it? Addicts of PMO search for the answer to these questions all of their lives. Some say it is because of the powerful withdrawal symptoms. In fact, the actual withdrawal symptoms from porn are so mild (see Chapter 6) that PMOers should know about smokers who have lived and died without ever realizing they are drug addicts.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre ? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Enjoyment has nothing to do with it. I enjoy lobster but I never got to the stage where I had to have lobsters everyday and multiple times like they are hanging round my neck. With other things in life we enjoy them whilst we are doing them but we don&rsquo;t sit feeling deprived when we are not. Some search for deep psychological reasons, the “Freudian Syndrome,” or “the child at the mother&rsquo;s breast.” Really it is just the reverse.</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you ?</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you?</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say:</p>
|
||||
<ul>
|
||||
<li>“It is educational!” So, when is your graduation?</li>
|
||||
|
|
@ -2067,7 +2067,7 @@ the world would also see the light and adopt my method.</li>
|
|||
<p>If you are expecting me to inform you of the terrible health issues that PMO addicts risk, that they are susceptible to be affected by PIED (porn induced erectile disfunction), unreliable arousals, fading penetration, loss of interest in real partners,loss of control over themselves, loss of relationships, that it is a filthy, disgusting habit and that <em>YOU</em> are a stupid, spineless, weak-willed jellyfish, then I must disappoint you. Those tactics never helped me to quit and if they were going to help you, you would already have quit.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our Method, which I shall refer to as EASYPEASY doesn&rsquo;t work that way. Some of the things that I am about to say, you might find difficult to believe. However by the time you&rsquo;ve finished reading the book, you&rsquo;ll not only believe them, but wonder how you could ever have been brainwashed into believing otherwise.</p>
|
||||
<p>There is a common misapprehension that we choose to watch porn. PMO addicts ( yes addicts) no more choose to do that than alcoholics choose to become alcoholics, or heroin addicts choose to become heroin addicts. It is true that we choose to boot up the laptop, fire up the browser and visit our favourite online harem<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> tube sites. I occasionally choose to go to the cinema, but I certainly didn&rsquo;t choose to spend my whole life in the cinema theatre. The curiosity and my nature took me there but I would not have done that if I had known it would addict me and cause me my health, happiness and relationships. Only if I had heard about PIED on my first visit to that porn site?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day ? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem ?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem?</p>
|
||||
<p>Like every other PMOer, you have been lured into the most sinister subtle trap that man and nature have combined to devise. There is not a parent, brother, sister on this planet, whether they be PMOer themselves or not, that likes the thought of their children using porn and PMO to cope and for pleasure. This means that all PMOers wish they had never started. Not surprising really, no one needs porn to enjoy life or cope with stress before they get hooked.</p>
|
||||
<p>At the same time all PMOers wish to continue to PMO. After all, no one forces us to turn on the incognito mode of the browser, whether we understand the reason or not, it is only PMOers themselves that decide to knock on the doors of the online harems.</p>
|
||||
<p>If there were a magic button that the PMOers could press to wake up the following morning as if they never accessed their very first tube site&hellip;. the only PMO addicts there would be tomorrow morning would be the youngsters who are still at the experimental stage. The only thing that prevents us from quitting is: FEAR!</p>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -21,7 +21,7 @@ If you are expecting me to inform you of the terrible health issues that PMO add
|
|||
<p>If you are expecting me to inform you of the terrible health issues that PMO addicts risk, that they are susceptible to be affected by PIED (porn induced erectile disfunction), unreliable arousals, fading penetration, loss of interest in real partners,loss of control over themselves, loss of relationships, that it is a filthy, disgusting habit and that <em>YOU</em> are a stupid, spineless, weak-willed jellyfish, then I must disappoint you. Those tactics never helped me to quit and if they were going to help you, you would already have quit.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our Method, which I shall refer to as EASYPEASY doesn’t work that way. Some of the things that I am about to say, you might find difficult to believe. However by the time you’ve finished reading the book, you’ll not only believe them, but wonder how you could ever have been brainwashed into believing otherwise.</p>
|
||||
<p>There is a common misapprehension that we choose to watch porn. PMO addicts ( yes addicts) no more choose to do that than alcoholics choose to become alcoholics, or heroin addicts choose to become heroin addicts. It is true that we choose to boot up the laptop, fire up the browser and visit our favourite online harem<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> tube sites. I occasionally choose to go to the cinema, but I certainly didn’t choose to spend my whole life in the cinema theatre. The curiosity and my nature took me there but I would not have done that if I had known it would addict me and cause me my health, happiness and relationships. Only if I had heard about PIED on my first visit to that porn site?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn’t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn’t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day ? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem ?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn’t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn’t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem?</p>
|
||||
<p>Like every other PMOer, you have been lured into the most sinister subtle trap that man and nature have combined to devise. There is not a parent, brother, sister on this planet, whether they be PMOer themselves or not, that likes the thought of their children using porn and PMO to cope and for pleasure. This means that all PMOers wish they had never started. Not surprising really, no one needs porn to enjoy life or cope with stress before they get hooked.</p>
|
||||
<p>At the same time all PMOers wish to continue to PMO. After all, no one forces us to turn on the incognito mode of the browser, whether we understand the reason or not, it is only PMOers themselves that decide to knock on the doors of the online harems.</p>
|
||||
<p>If there were a magic button that the PMOers could press to wake up the following morning as if they never accessed their very first tube site…. the only PMO addicts there would be tomorrow morning would be the youngsters who are still at the experimental stage. The only thing that prevents us from quitting is: FEAR!</p>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -25,13 +25,13 @@
|
|||
<p>As I said previously, the problem is not explaining why it is easy to stop; it is explaining why it is difficult. In fact, the real problem is explaining scientifically why anybody does it even after getting the insights on the neurological damages of addictions not limited to porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The whole business of porn is an extraordinary enigma. One of the reasons we get on to it is because of the thousands of people are already into it, about 35% of the population approximately. Yet every one of them wishes he or she had not started in the first place, telling us that life is like driving in second gear. We cannot quite believe they are not enjoying it. We associate it with freedom or being “sex-educated” and work hard to become hooked ourselves. We then spend the rest of our lives telling others not to do it and trying to kick the habit ourselves.</p>
|
||||
<p>We also spend the rest of our lives feeling hopeless and miserable. Time spent on porn can accumulate to a large percentage of our life in this planet! What do we do with that amount of time spent? We ‘educate’ ourselves with supranormal<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> ‘material’ that makes us stupidly prefer and childishly long for these cold images - even when warm real ones are available. By the constant surge and drop of dopamine induced by PMO, we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of irritability, anger, frustration, stress, fatigue<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup>, PIED, hypofrontality etc. In short, it is a lifetime of slavery. It is logically and intuitively clear that amative sex (physical touch, feel, voice etc.) is the best part of sex and is even better (if Karezza<sup id="fnref:3"><a href="#fn:3" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">3</a></sup> is practised, although not necessary for the current purposes) than the propagative (orgasm) part, except when children are desired. So, when we use porn in the absence of the best part of sex we feel miserable and guilty.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography’s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn’t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren’t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it ? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography’s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn’t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren’t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>The PMOer despises himself, every time he has an unreliable erection, a fading penetration, reading about PIED and other stuff on the YBOP forum, every time he could not pull himself up to exercise after a daytime PMO, every PMO behind his or her trustfully asleep partner’s back, every time he sees his tired face and lifeless eyes in the restroom mirror.</p>
|
||||
<p>Having to go through life with these awful black shadows at the back of his mind, what does he get out of it? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Pleasure? Enjoyment? Relaxation? A prop? A boost? All illusions, unless you consider the wearing of tight shoes to enjoy the removal of them as some sort of pleasure!</p>
|
||||
<p>The real problem is trying to explain not only why PMOers find it difficult to stop but why anybody does it at all after knowing about brain neuroplasticity. You are probably thinking: “That’s all very well. I know this, but once you are hooked on these things it is very difficult to stop.” But why is it so difficult, and why do we have to do it? Addicts of PMO search for the answer to these questions all of their lives. Some say it is because of the powerful withdrawal symptoms. In fact, the actual withdrawal symptoms from porn are so mild (see Chapter 6) that PMOers should know about smokers who have lived and died without ever realizing they are drug addicts.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre ? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Enjoyment has nothing to do with it. I enjoy lobster but I never got to the stage where I had to have lobsters everyday and multiple times like they are hanging round my neck. With other things in life we enjoy them whilst we are doing them but we don’t sit feeling deprived when we are not. Some search for deep psychological reasons, the “Freudian Syndrome,” or “the child at the mother’s breast.” Really it is just the reverse.</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you ?</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you?</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say:</p>
|
||||
<ul>
|
||||
<li>“It is educational!” So, when is your graduation?</li>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -90,7 +90,7 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
</div>
|
||||
<p>Through a process of natural selection over thousand of years, our minds and bodies have developed techniques for rewarding actions that multiply and sustain humanity. Yet our minds and bodies are not ready for the supernormal stimulus that is bigger, brighter, colourful, edgier and more shocking than the one we have now. We are attracted proportional to the degree of how far the outlier is from our individual normal. It can be two dimensional clip - and a muted one at that - we will get aroused. Look at the same clip again and again and you won’t be. You just moved your red line close to the outlier and in no time you will enclose it in your normal consciousness. It is natural and it is so that you can multiply and grow this human race. In real life there are checks and balances in place so you take a break and go away do something else. With internet porn you there are no such checks and balances and you are living in a virtual harem!</p>
|
||||
<p>When we took a ‘peep’ at internet porn the first time, a few images were titillating but most were disgusting, causing you to avert your eyes away. Like you would if had accidentally glanced a feeding mother’s breast. And some of us are even revolted with what they saw when the star reminded them of someone dear to their heart or a scene which recalled their own instance of being the victim. Some don’t feel like it to browse and masturbate at the same time. It may be hard to believe for you but the non-PMOs, who don’t PMO after their first time, are the lucky ones. They actually decided that it was not their cup of tea. It must be hard for you to believe but stay with me.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not ? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That’s all.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That’s all.</p>
|
||||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h3 id="are-pmoers-mentally-weak"><strong>Are PMOers Mentally Weak?</strong></h3>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -46,7 +46,7 @@
|
|||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h2 id="women-and-porn"><strong>Women And Porn</strong></h2>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn’t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn ? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn’t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>Porn and internet porn does not help your sex life; it destroys it totally. Having to hide your internet footprints, trying to delete your history, fearing accidental exposure to your boyfriend or kids, body pains, doubtful symptoms, fighting self doubts, arguing with yourself about your responsibilities in the ill effects of your addiction… well, why do you want to put yourself in such a bad situation?</p>
|
||||
<p>Not only is there nothing to give up but there are marvellous positive gains to be had. When PMOers contemplate quitting they tend to concentrate on health and virility. These are obviously valid and important issues but I personally believe the greatest gains from stopping are psychological:</p>
|
||||
<ol>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -81,7 +81,7 @@
|
|||
</blockquote>
|
||||
<p>I can understand why the ED and the risks of ruining one’s mental health didn’t help me to quit. I could cope with the former and block my mind to the latter. As you are already aware, my method is not to frighten you into quitting but the complete opposite - to make you realize just how more enjoyable your life will be when you have escaped.</p>
|
||||
<p>However, I do believe that if I could have seen what was happening inside my brain, this would have helped me to quit. Now I’m not referring to the shock technique of showing a PMOer the effect of the hidden attribute of internet porn on the reward circuit of the brain. It was obvious to me from my unreliable arousals, fading penetrations, lack of energy, unemotional sex (as in just a muscle twitch), hit-seek escalations of porn search for novelty and shock that something is not going right. None of these are catastrophic for me as I have trained myself in cognitive behavioural techniques as discussed before but I did experience them quite often enough. Practising CBT/REBT gave me enough grounding and stability to look at my addiction in a different and better way than I’d have if I were not aware of the cognitive biases. Provided I kept functioning, even at a mediocre level, they were less of an embarrassment than a lost tooth - at least nobody could see my mind.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don’t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice ? That’s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don’t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice? That’s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>Many researchers and doctors are now relating various mental health problems in addition to the physiological ones caused by internet porn and PMO in general. This is no surprise to me. The mainstream medical world has laboured that PMO has never been scientifically proven to be the direct cause of the issues reported by self-confessing individuals. Admitting one’s sexual inability in public is such a shame triggering event, why would anyone do that unless they are really concerned? And probably many have found the cause and have eliminated it. This book is going to help you to get rid of it and also become a happy ex PMOer. No porn whatsoever, no porn aided masturbation. And of course no unnecessary orgasms. The only aid will be the touch, smell and voice of your partner. Like whole wheat bread after a well developed appetite, you will produce enough juices to break down the hard bread and it comes as a beautiful refreshment. No high fructose corn syrup injected fake food. The evidence is so overwhelming as not to need proof. No one ever scientifically proved to me exactly why, when I bang my thumb with a hammer, it hurts. I soon got the message.</p>
|
||||
<p>I must emphasize that I am not a doctor but just like the hammer and the thumb, it soon became obvious to me that the periods of my life outside of sex that were marked by low levels of irritation tolerance, lack of energy, temper, moody thoughts, zoning out of social scenes etc. were directly related to my masturbation and especially the supernormal stimulus of IP<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup>. However, I truly believe that the greatest hazard that IP causes to our health is the gradual and progressive deterioration of our sex life caused by super-substitutes. The novelty, shock, variety in size and nature of internet porn can slowly take away the magic of the real sex. Worse, the RC<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup> reward circuits are flooding unnaturally and at high abnormal levels so that they close up the receptors and also diminish any potency and effectiveness of normal de-stressors that work in the RC. This predisposes one to be depressed and become needy to lot more other ‘crutches’ of life such as cigarettes and alcohol or even causing the host to think of committing suicide. Even the real vagina will not be a match for the death grip of masturbation - and the little monster is kept alive.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our lives are ‘blessed’ with challenges – yes, ‘blessed’- they are needed to keep us strong and make us better. If our nervous systems is pre-disposed to making a molehill out of a mountain it will seek a ‘fix. When it seeks a hit or a mountain out of a molehill when it interfaces with reality then is it worth it? Our body and our brain is designed to make use of optimal levels of these brain chemicals. I don’t think a man who fails in satisfying a woman should consider himself worthless.</p>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -26,7 +26,7 @@
|
|||
</ol>
|
||||
<p>Once that little monster leaves your body the awful feeling of insecurity ends. Your confidence returns, together with a marvellous feeling of self-respect. You obtain the assurance to take control of your life, not only in your other habits but also in all other ways. This is one of the many great advantages of being free from any addiction.</p>
|
||||
<p>As I have said, the ‘compartment’ myth is due to one of many tricks that the little monster plays with your mind. In fact, these tricks do not make it easier to stop, they make it harder. The PMOer is therefore left with a permanent hunger that he can never satisfy. This is why many PMOers turn to cigarettes, heavy drinking or even harder drugs in order to satisfy the void.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster ? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
|
||||
|
||||
<div id="nextprev">
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -829,7 +829,7 @@ when you were a PMOer. Just think, how can you possibly cure an addict of addict
|
|||
</ol>
|
||||
<p>Once that little monster leaves your body the awful feeling of insecurity ends. Your confidence returns, together with a marvellous feeling of self-respect. You obtain the assurance to take control of your life, not only in your other habits but also in all other ways. This is one of the many great advantages of being free from any addiction.</p>
|
||||
<p>As I have said, the ‘compartment’ myth is due to one of many tricks that the little monster plays with your mind. In fact, these tricks do not make it easier to stop, they make it harder. The PMOer is therefore left with a permanent hunger that he can never satisfy. This is why many PMOers turn to cigarettes, heavy drinking or even harder drugs in order to satisfy the void.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster ? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
</description>
|
||||
</item>
|
||||
|
||||
|
|
@ -1296,7 +1296,7 @@ Get out of the habit of envying PMOers and start seeing them as the miserable, p
|
|||
</blockquote>
|
||||
<p>I can understand why the ED and the risks of ruining one’s mental health didn&rsquo;t help me to quit. I could cope with the former and block my mind to the latter. As you are already aware, my method is not to frighten you into quitting but the complete opposite - to make you realize just how more enjoyable your life will be when you have escaped.</p>
|
||||
<p>However, I do believe that if I could have seen what was happening inside my brain, this would have helped me to quit. Now I&rsquo;m not referring to the shock technique of showing a PMOer the effect of the hidden attribute of internet porn on the reward circuit of the brain. It was obvious to me from my unreliable arousals, fading penetrations, lack of energy, unemotional sex (as in just a muscle twitch), hit-seek escalations of porn search for novelty and shock that something is not going right. None of these are catastrophic for me as I have trained myself in cognitive behavioural techniques as discussed before but I did experience them quite often enough. Practising CBT/REBT gave me enough grounding and stability to look at my addiction in a different and better way than I’d have if I were not aware of the cognitive biases. Provided I kept functioning, even at a mediocre level, they were less of an embarrassment than a lost tooth - at least nobody could see my mind.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice ? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>Many researchers and doctors are now relating various mental health problems in addition to the physiological ones caused by internet porn and PMO in general. This is no surprise to me. The mainstream medical world has laboured that PMO has never been scientifically proven to be the direct cause of the issues reported by self-confessing individuals. Admitting one’s sexual inability in public is such a shame triggering event, why would anyone do that unless they are really concerned? And probably many have found the cause and have eliminated it. This book is going to help you to get rid of it and also become a happy ex PMOer. No porn whatsoever, no porn aided masturbation. And of course no unnecessary orgasms. The only aid will be the touch, smell and voice of your partner. Like whole wheat bread after a well developed appetite, you will produce enough juices to break down the hard bread and it comes as a beautiful refreshment. No high fructose corn syrup injected fake food. The evidence is so overwhelming as not to need proof. No one ever scientifically proved to me exactly why, when I bang my thumb with a hammer, it hurts. I soon got the message.</p>
|
||||
<p>I must emphasize that I am not a doctor but just like the hammer and the thumb, it soon became obvious to me that the periods of my life outside of sex that were marked by low levels of irritation tolerance, lack of energy, temper, moody thoughts, zoning out of social scenes etc. were directly related to my masturbation and especially the supernormal stimulus of IP<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup>. However, I truly believe that the greatest hazard that IP causes to our health is the gradual and progressive deterioration of our sex life caused by super-substitutes. The novelty, shock, variety in size and nature of internet porn can slowly take away the magic of the real sex. Worse, the RC<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup> reward circuits are flooding unnaturally and at high abnormal levels so that they close up the receptors and also diminish any potency and effectiveness of normal de-stressors that work in the RC. This predisposes one to be depressed and become needy to lot more other ‘crutches’ of life such as cigarettes and alcohol or even causing the host to think of committing suicide. Even the real vagina will not be a match for the death grip of masturbation - and the little monster is kept alive.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our lives are ‘blessed’ with challenges – yes, ‘blessed’- they are needed to keep us strong and make us better. If our nervous systems is pre-disposed to making a molehill out of a mountain it will seek a ‘fix. When it seeks a hit or a mountain out of a molehill when it interfaces with reality then is it worth it? Our body and our brain is designed to make use of optimal levels of these brain chemicals. I don’t think a man who fails in satisfying a woman should consider himself worthless.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1423,7 +1423,7 @@ pleasure.”</em></p>
|
|||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h2 id="women-and-porn"><strong>Women And Porn</strong></h2>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn ? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>Porn and internet porn does not help your sex life; it destroys it totally. Having to hide your internet footprints, trying to delete your history, fearing accidental exposure to your boyfriend or kids, body pains, doubtful symptoms, fighting self doubts, arguing with yourself about your responsibilities in the ill effects of your addiction&hellip; well, why do you want to put yourself in such a bad situation?</p>
|
||||
<p>Not only is there nothing to give up but there are marvellous positive gains to be had. When PMOers contemplate quitting they tend to concentrate on health and virility. These are obviously valid and important issues but I personally believe the greatest gains from stopping are psychological:</p>
|
||||
<ol>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1733,7 +1733,7 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
</div>
|
||||
<p>Through a process of natural selection over thousand of years, our minds and bodies have developed techniques for rewarding actions that multiply and sustain humanity. Yet our minds and bodies are not ready for the supernormal stimulus that is bigger, brighter, colourful, edgier and more shocking than the one we have now. We are attracted proportional to the degree of how far the outlier is from our individual normal. It can be two dimensional clip - and a muted one at that - we will get aroused. Look at the same clip again and again and you won’t be. You just moved your red line close to the outlier and in no time you will enclose it in your normal consciousness. It is natural and it is so that you can multiply and grow this human race. In real life there are checks and balances in place so you take a break and go away do something else. With internet porn you there are no such checks and balances and you are living in a virtual harem!</p>
|
||||
<p>When we took a ‘peep’ at internet porn the first time, a few images were titillating but most were disgusting, causing you to avert your eyes away. Like you would if had accidentally glanced a feeding mother’s breast. And some of us are even revolted with what they saw when the star reminded them of someone dear to their heart or a scene which recalled their own instance of being the victim. Some don’t feel like it to browse and masturbate at the same time. It may be hard to believe for you but the non-PMOs, who don’t PMO after their first time, are the lucky ones. They actually decided that it was not their cup of tea. It must be hard for you to believe but stay with me.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not ? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h3 id="are-pmoers-mentally-weak"><strong>Are PMOers Mentally Weak?</strong></h3>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1831,13 +1831,13 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
<p>As I said previously, the problem is not explaining why it is easy to stop; it is explaining why it is difficult. In fact, the real problem is explaining scientifically why anybody does it even after getting the insights on the neurological damages of addictions not limited to porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The whole business of porn is an extraordinary enigma. One of the reasons we get on to it is because of the thousands of people are already into it, about 35% of the population approximately. Yet every one of them wishes he or she had not started in the first place, telling us that life is like driving in second gear. We cannot quite believe they are not enjoying it. We associate it with freedom or being “sex-educated” and work hard to become hooked ourselves. We then spend the rest of our lives telling others not to do it and trying to kick the habit ourselves.</p>
|
||||
<p>We also spend the rest of our lives feeling hopeless and miserable. Time spent on porn can accumulate to a large percentage of our life in this planet! What do we do with that amount of time spent? We ‘educate’ ourselves with supranormal<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> ‘material’ that makes us stupidly prefer and childishly long for these cold images - even when warm real ones are available. By the constant surge and drop of dopamine induced by PMO, we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of irritability, anger, frustration, stress, fatigue<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup>, PIED, hypofrontality etc. In short, it is a lifetime of slavery. It is logically and intuitively clear that amative sex (physical touch, feel, voice etc.) is the best part of sex and is even better (if Karezza<sup id="fnref:3"><a href="#fn:3" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">3</a></sup> is practised, although not necessary for the current purposes) than the propagative (orgasm) part, except when children are desired. So, when we use porn in the absence of the best part of sex we feel miserable and guilty.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it ? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>The PMOer despises himself, every time he has an unreliable erection, a fading penetration, reading about PIED and other stuff on the YBOP forum, every time he could not pull himself up to exercise after a daytime PMO, every PMO behind his or her trustfully asleep partner’s back, every time he sees his tired face and lifeless eyes in the restroom mirror.</p>
|
||||
<p>Having to go through life with these awful black shadows at the back of his mind, what does he get out of it? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Pleasure? Enjoyment? Relaxation? A prop? A boost? All illusions, unless you consider the wearing of tight shoes to enjoy the removal of them as some sort of pleasure!</p>
|
||||
<p>The real problem is trying to explain not only why PMOers find it difficult to stop but why anybody does it at all after knowing about brain neuroplasticity. You are probably thinking: “That&rsquo;s all very well. I know this, but once you are hooked on these things it is very difficult to stop.” But why is it so difficult, and why do we have to do it? Addicts of PMO search for the answer to these questions all of their lives. Some say it is because of the powerful withdrawal symptoms. In fact, the actual withdrawal symptoms from porn are so mild (see Chapter 6) that PMOers should know about smokers who have lived and died without ever realizing they are drug addicts.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre ? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Enjoyment has nothing to do with it. I enjoy lobster but I never got to the stage where I had to have lobsters everyday and multiple times like they are hanging round my neck. With other things in life we enjoy them whilst we are doing them but we don&rsquo;t sit feeling deprived when we are not. Some search for deep psychological reasons, the “Freudian Syndrome,” or “the child at the mother&rsquo;s breast.” Really it is just the reverse.</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you ?</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you?</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say:</p>
|
||||
<ul>
|
||||
<li>“It is educational!” So, when is your graduation?</li>
|
||||
|
|
@ -2068,7 +2068,7 @@ the world would also see the light and adopt my method.</li>
|
|||
<p>If you are expecting me to inform you of the terrible health issues that PMO addicts risk, that they are susceptible to be affected by PIED (porn induced erectile disfunction), unreliable arousals, fading penetration, loss of interest in real partners,loss of control over themselves, loss of relationships, that it is a filthy, disgusting habit and that <em>YOU</em> are a stupid, spineless, weak-willed jellyfish, then I must disappoint you. Those tactics never helped me to quit and if they were going to help you, you would already have quit.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our Method, which I shall refer to as EASYPEASY doesn&rsquo;t work that way. Some of the things that I am about to say, you might find difficult to believe. However by the time you&rsquo;ve finished reading the book, you&rsquo;ll not only believe them, but wonder how you could ever have been brainwashed into believing otherwise.</p>
|
||||
<p>There is a common misapprehension that we choose to watch porn. PMO addicts ( yes addicts) no more choose to do that than alcoholics choose to become alcoholics, or heroin addicts choose to become heroin addicts. It is true that we choose to boot up the laptop, fire up the browser and visit our favourite online harem<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> tube sites. I occasionally choose to go to the cinema, but I certainly didn&rsquo;t choose to spend my whole life in the cinema theatre. The curiosity and my nature took me there but I would not have done that if I had known it would addict me and cause me my health, happiness and relationships. Only if I had heard about PIED on my first visit to that porn site?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day ? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem ?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem?</p>
|
||||
<p>Like every other PMOer, you have been lured into the most sinister subtle trap that man and nature have combined to devise. There is not a parent, brother, sister on this planet, whether they be PMOer themselves or not, that likes the thought of their children using porn and PMO to cope and for pleasure. This means that all PMOers wish they had never started. Not surprising really, no one needs porn to enjoy life or cope with stress before they get hooked.</p>
|
||||
<p>At the same time all PMOers wish to continue to PMO. After all, no one forces us to turn on the incognito mode of the browser, whether we understand the reason or not, it is only PMOers themselves that decide to knock on the doors of the online harems.</p>
|
||||
<p>If there were a magic button that the PMOers could press to wake up the following morning as if they never accessed their very first tube site&hellip;. the only PMO addicts there would be tomorrow morning would be the youngsters who are still at the experimental stage. The only thing that prevents us from quitting is: FEAR!</p>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -829,7 +829,7 @@ when you were a PMOer. Just think, how can you possibly cure an addict of addict
|
|||
</ol>
|
||||
<p>Once that little monster leaves your body the awful feeling of insecurity ends. Your confidence returns, together with a marvellous feeling of self-respect. You obtain the assurance to take control of your life, not only in your other habits but also in all other ways. This is one of the many great advantages of being free from any addiction.</p>
|
||||
<p>As I have said, the ‘compartment’ myth is due to one of many tricks that the little monster plays with your mind. In fact, these tricks do not make it easier to stop, they make it harder. The PMOer is therefore left with a permanent hunger that he can never satisfy. This is why many PMOers turn to cigarettes, heavy drinking or even harder drugs in order to satisfy the void.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster ? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
</description>
|
||||
</item>
|
||||
|
||||
|
|
@ -1296,7 +1296,7 @@ Get out of the habit of envying PMOers and start seeing them as the miserable, p
|
|||
</blockquote>
|
||||
<p>I can understand why the ED and the risks of ruining one’s mental health didn&rsquo;t help me to quit. I could cope with the former and block my mind to the latter. As you are already aware, my method is not to frighten you into quitting but the complete opposite - to make you realize just how more enjoyable your life will be when you have escaped.</p>
|
||||
<p>However, I do believe that if I could have seen what was happening inside my brain, this would have helped me to quit. Now I&rsquo;m not referring to the shock technique of showing a PMOer the effect of the hidden attribute of internet porn on the reward circuit of the brain. It was obvious to me from my unreliable arousals, fading penetrations, lack of energy, unemotional sex (as in just a muscle twitch), hit-seek escalations of porn search for novelty and shock that something is not going right. None of these are catastrophic for me as I have trained myself in cognitive behavioural techniques as discussed before but I did experience them quite often enough. Practising CBT/REBT gave me enough grounding and stability to look at my addiction in a different and better way than I’d have if I were not aware of the cognitive biases. Provided I kept functioning, even at a mediocre level, they were less of an embarrassment than a lost tooth - at least nobody could see my mind.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice ? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>Many researchers and doctors are now relating various mental health problems in addition to the physiological ones caused by internet porn and PMO in general. This is no surprise to me. The mainstream medical world has laboured that PMO has never been scientifically proven to be the direct cause of the issues reported by self-confessing individuals. Admitting one’s sexual inability in public is such a shame triggering event, why would anyone do that unless they are really concerned? And probably many have found the cause and have eliminated it. This book is going to help you to get rid of it and also become a happy ex PMOer. No porn whatsoever, no porn aided masturbation. And of course no unnecessary orgasms. The only aid will be the touch, smell and voice of your partner. Like whole wheat bread after a well developed appetite, you will produce enough juices to break down the hard bread and it comes as a beautiful refreshment. No high fructose corn syrup injected fake food. The evidence is so overwhelming as not to need proof. No one ever scientifically proved to me exactly why, when I bang my thumb with a hammer, it hurts. I soon got the message.</p>
|
||||
<p>I must emphasize that I am not a doctor but just like the hammer and the thumb, it soon became obvious to me that the periods of my life outside of sex that were marked by low levels of irritation tolerance, lack of energy, temper, moody thoughts, zoning out of social scenes etc. were directly related to my masturbation and especially the supernormal stimulus of IP<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup>. However, I truly believe that the greatest hazard that IP causes to our health is the gradual and progressive deterioration of our sex life caused by super-substitutes. The novelty, shock, variety in size and nature of internet porn can slowly take away the magic of the real sex. Worse, the RC<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup> reward circuits are flooding unnaturally and at high abnormal levels so that they close up the receptors and also diminish any potency and effectiveness of normal de-stressors that work in the RC. This predisposes one to be depressed and become needy to lot more other ‘crutches’ of life such as cigarettes and alcohol or even causing the host to think of committing suicide. Even the real vagina will not be a match for the death grip of masturbation - and the little monster is kept alive.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our lives are ‘blessed’ with challenges – yes, ‘blessed’- they are needed to keep us strong and make us better. If our nervous systems is pre-disposed to making a molehill out of a mountain it will seek a ‘fix. When it seeks a hit or a mountain out of a molehill when it interfaces with reality then is it worth it? Our body and our brain is designed to make use of optimal levels of these brain chemicals. I don’t think a man who fails in satisfying a woman should consider himself worthless.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1423,7 +1423,7 @@ pleasure.”</em></p>
|
|||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h2 id="women-and-porn"><strong>Women And Porn</strong></h2>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn ? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>Porn and internet porn does not help your sex life; it destroys it totally. Having to hide your internet footprints, trying to delete your history, fearing accidental exposure to your boyfriend or kids, body pains, doubtful symptoms, fighting self doubts, arguing with yourself about your responsibilities in the ill effects of your addiction&hellip; well, why do you want to put yourself in such a bad situation?</p>
|
||||
<p>Not only is there nothing to give up but there are marvellous positive gains to be had. When PMOers contemplate quitting they tend to concentrate on health and virility. These are obviously valid and important issues but I personally believe the greatest gains from stopping are psychological:</p>
|
||||
<ol>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1733,7 +1733,7 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
</div>
|
||||
<p>Through a process of natural selection over thousand of years, our minds and bodies have developed techniques for rewarding actions that multiply and sustain humanity. Yet our minds and bodies are not ready for the supernormal stimulus that is bigger, brighter, colourful, edgier and more shocking than the one we have now. We are attracted proportional to the degree of how far the outlier is from our individual normal. It can be two dimensional clip - and a muted one at that - we will get aroused. Look at the same clip again and again and you won’t be. You just moved your red line close to the outlier and in no time you will enclose it in your normal consciousness. It is natural and it is so that you can multiply and grow this human race. In real life there are checks and balances in place so you take a break and go away do something else. With internet porn you there are no such checks and balances and you are living in a virtual harem!</p>
|
||||
<p>When we took a ‘peep’ at internet porn the first time, a few images were titillating but most were disgusting, causing you to avert your eyes away. Like you would if had accidentally glanced a feeding mother’s breast. And some of us are even revolted with what they saw when the star reminded them of someone dear to their heart or a scene which recalled their own instance of being the victim. Some don’t feel like it to browse and masturbate at the same time. It may be hard to believe for you but the non-PMOs, who don’t PMO after their first time, are the lucky ones. They actually decided that it was not their cup of tea. It must be hard for you to believe but stay with me.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not ? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h3 id="are-pmoers-mentally-weak"><strong>Are PMOers Mentally Weak?</strong></h3>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1831,13 +1831,13 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
<p>As I said previously, the problem is not explaining why it is easy to stop; it is explaining why it is difficult. In fact, the real problem is explaining scientifically why anybody does it even after getting the insights on the neurological damages of addictions not limited to porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The whole business of porn is an extraordinary enigma. One of the reasons we get on to it is because of the thousands of people are already into it, about 35% of the population approximately. Yet every one of them wishes he or she had not started in the first place, telling us that life is like driving in second gear. We cannot quite believe they are not enjoying it. We associate it with freedom or being “sex-educated” and work hard to become hooked ourselves. We then spend the rest of our lives telling others not to do it and trying to kick the habit ourselves.</p>
|
||||
<p>We also spend the rest of our lives feeling hopeless and miserable. Time spent on porn can accumulate to a large percentage of our life in this planet! What do we do with that amount of time spent? We ‘educate’ ourselves with supranormal<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> ‘material’ that makes us stupidly prefer and childishly long for these cold images - even when warm real ones are available. By the constant surge and drop of dopamine induced by PMO, we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of irritability, anger, frustration, stress, fatigue<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup>, PIED, hypofrontality etc. In short, it is a lifetime of slavery. It is logically and intuitively clear that amative sex (physical touch, feel, voice etc.) is the best part of sex and is even better (if Karezza<sup id="fnref:3"><a href="#fn:3" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">3</a></sup> is practised, although not necessary for the current purposes) than the propagative (orgasm) part, except when children are desired. So, when we use porn in the absence of the best part of sex we feel miserable and guilty.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it ? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>The PMOer despises himself, every time he has an unreliable erection, a fading penetration, reading about PIED and other stuff on the YBOP forum, every time he could not pull himself up to exercise after a daytime PMO, every PMO behind his or her trustfully asleep partner’s back, every time he sees his tired face and lifeless eyes in the restroom mirror.</p>
|
||||
<p>Having to go through life with these awful black shadows at the back of his mind, what does he get out of it? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Pleasure? Enjoyment? Relaxation? A prop? A boost? All illusions, unless you consider the wearing of tight shoes to enjoy the removal of them as some sort of pleasure!</p>
|
||||
<p>The real problem is trying to explain not only why PMOers find it difficult to stop but why anybody does it at all after knowing about brain neuroplasticity. You are probably thinking: “That&rsquo;s all very well. I know this, but once you are hooked on these things it is very difficult to stop.” But why is it so difficult, and why do we have to do it? Addicts of PMO search for the answer to these questions all of their lives. Some say it is because of the powerful withdrawal symptoms. In fact, the actual withdrawal symptoms from porn are so mild (see Chapter 6) that PMOers should know about smokers who have lived and died without ever realizing they are drug addicts.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre ? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Enjoyment has nothing to do with it. I enjoy lobster but I never got to the stage where I had to have lobsters everyday and multiple times like they are hanging round my neck. With other things in life we enjoy them whilst we are doing them but we don&rsquo;t sit feeling deprived when we are not. Some search for deep psychological reasons, the “Freudian Syndrome,” or “the child at the mother&rsquo;s breast.” Really it is just the reverse.</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you ?</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you?</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say:</p>
|
||||
<ul>
|
||||
<li>“It is educational!” So, when is your graduation?</li>
|
||||
|
|
@ -2068,7 +2068,7 @@ the world would also see the light and adopt my method.</li>
|
|||
<p>If you are expecting me to inform you of the terrible health issues that PMO addicts risk, that they are susceptible to be affected by PIED (porn induced erectile disfunction), unreliable arousals, fading penetration, loss of interest in real partners,loss of control over themselves, loss of relationships, that it is a filthy, disgusting habit and that <em>YOU</em> are a stupid, spineless, weak-willed jellyfish, then I must disappoint you. Those tactics never helped me to quit and if they were going to help you, you would already have quit.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our Method, which I shall refer to as EASYPEASY doesn&rsquo;t work that way. Some of the things that I am about to say, you might find difficult to believe. However by the time you&rsquo;ve finished reading the book, you&rsquo;ll not only believe them, but wonder how you could ever have been brainwashed into believing otherwise.</p>
|
||||
<p>There is a common misapprehension that we choose to watch porn. PMO addicts ( yes addicts) no more choose to do that than alcoholics choose to become alcoholics, or heroin addicts choose to become heroin addicts. It is true that we choose to boot up the laptop, fire up the browser and visit our favourite online harem<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> tube sites. I occasionally choose to go to the cinema, but I certainly didn&rsquo;t choose to spend my whole life in the cinema theatre. The curiosity and my nature took me there but I would not have done that if I had known it would addict me and cause me my health, happiness and relationships. Only if I had heard about PIED on my first visit to that porn site?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day ? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem ?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem?</p>
|
||||
<p>Like every other PMOer, you have been lured into the most sinister subtle trap that man and nature have combined to devise. There is not a parent, brother, sister on this planet, whether they be PMOer themselves or not, that likes the thought of their children using porn and PMO to cope and for pleasure. This means that all PMOers wish they had never started. Not surprising really, no one needs porn to enjoy life or cope with stress before they get hooked.</p>
|
||||
<p>At the same time all PMOers wish to continue to PMO. After all, no one forces us to turn on the incognito mode of the browser, whether we understand the reason or not, it is only PMOers themselves that decide to knock on the doors of the online harems.</p>
|
||||
<p>If there were a magic button that the PMOers could press to wake up the following morning as if they never accessed their very first tube site&hellip;. the only PMO addicts there would be tomorrow morning would be the youngsters who are still at the experimental stage. The only thing that prevents us from quitting is: FEAR!</p>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -829,7 +829,7 @@ when you were a PMOer. Just think, how can you possibly cure an addict of addict
|
|||
</ol>
|
||||
<p>Once that little monster leaves your body the awful feeling of insecurity ends. Your confidence returns, together with a marvellous feeling of self-respect. You obtain the assurance to take control of your life, not only in your other habits but also in all other ways. This is one of the many great advantages of being free from any addiction.</p>
|
||||
<p>As I have said, the ‘compartment’ myth is due to one of many tricks that the little monster plays with your mind. In fact, these tricks do not make it easier to stop, they make it harder. The PMOer is therefore left with a permanent hunger that he can never satisfy. This is why many PMOers turn to cigarettes, heavy drinking or even harder drugs in order to satisfy the void.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster ? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
</description>
|
||||
</item>
|
||||
|
||||
|
|
@ -1296,7 +1296,7 @@ Get out of the habit of envying PMOers and start seeing them as the miserable, p
|
|||
</blockquote>
|
||||
<p>I can understand why the ED and the risks of ruining one’s mental health didn&rsquo;t help me to quit. I could cope with the former and block my mind to the latter. As you are already aware, my method is not to frighten you into quitting but the complete opposite - to make you realize just how more enjoyable your life will be when you have escaped.</p>
|
||||
<p>However, I do believe that if I could have seen what was happening inside my brain, this would have helped me to quit. Now I&rsquo;m not referring to the shock technique of showing a PMOer the effect of the hidden attribute of internet porn on the reward circuit of the brain. It was obvious to me from my unreliable arousals, fading penetrations, lack of energy, unemotional sex (as in just a muscle twitch), hit-seek escalations of porn search for novelty and shock that something is not going right. None of these are catastrophic for me as I have trained myself in cognitive behavioural techniques as discussed before but I did experience them quite often enough. Practising CBT/REBT gave me enough grounding and stability to look at my addiction in a different and better way than I’d have if I were not aware of the cognitive biases. Provided I kept functioning, even at a mediocre level, they were less of an embarrassment than a lost tooth - at least nobody could see my mind.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice ? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>Many researchers and doctors are now relating various mental health problems in addition to the physiological ones caused by internet porn and PMO in general. This is no surprise to me. The mainstream medical world has laboured that PMO has never been scientifically proven to be the direct cause of the issues reported by self-confessing individuals. Admitting one’s sexual inability in public is such a shame triggering event, why would anyone do that unless they are really concerned? And probably many have found the cause and have eliminated it. This book is going to help you to get rid of it and also become a happy ex PMOer. No porn whatsoever, no porn aided masturbation. And of course no unnecessary orgasms. The only aid will be the touch, smell and voice of your partner. Like whole wheat bread after a well developed appetite, you will produce enough juices to break down the hard bread and it comes as a beautiful refreshment. No high fructose corn syrup injected fake food. The evidence is so overwhelming as not to need proof. No one ever scientifically proved to me exactly why, when I bang my thumb with a hammer, it hurts. I soon got the message.</p>
|
||||
<p>I must emphasize that I am not a doctor but just like the hammer and the thumb, it soon became obvious to me that the periods of my life outside of sex that were marked by low levels of irritation tolerance, lack of energy, temper, moody thoughts, zoning out of social scenes etc. were directly related to my masturbation and especially the supernormal stimulus of IP<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup>. However, I truly believe that the greatest hazard that IP causes to our health is the gradual and progressive deterioration of our sex life caused by super-substitutes. The novelty, shock, variety in size and nature of internet porn can slowly take away the magic of the real sex. Worse, the RC<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup> reward circuits are flooding unnaturally and at high abnormal levels so that they close up the receptors and also diminish any potency and effectiveness of normal de-stressors that work in the RC. This predisposes one to be depressed and become needy to lot more other ‘crutches’ of life such as cigarettes and alcohol or even causing the host to think of committing suicide. Even the real vagina will not be a match for the death grip of masturbation - and the little monster is kept alive.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our lives are ‘blessed’ with challenges – yes, ‘blessed’- they are needed to keep us strong and make us better. If our nervous systems is pre-disposed to making a molehill out of a mountain it will seek a ‘fix. When it seeks a hit or a mountain out of a molehill when it interfaces with reality then is it worth it? Our body and our brain is designed to make use of optimal levels of these brain chemicals. I don’t think a man who fails in satisfying a woman should consider himself worthless.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1423,7 +1423,7 @@ pleasure.”</em></p>
|
|||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h2 id="women-and-porn"><strong>Women And Porn</strong></h2>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn ? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>Porn and internet porn does not help your sex life; it destroys it totally. Having to hide your internet footprints, trying to delete your history, fearing accidental exposure to your boyfriend or kids, body pains, doubtful symptoms, fighting self doubts, arguing with yourself about your responsibilities in the ill effects of your addiction&hellip; well, why do you want to put yourself in such a bad situation?</p>
|
||||
<p>Not only is there nothing to give up but there are marvellous positive gains to be had. When PMOers contemplate quitting they tend to concentrate on health and virility. These are obviously valid and important issues but I personally believe the greatest gains from stopping are psychological:</p>
|
||||
<ol>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1733,7 +1733,7 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
</div>
|
||||
<p>Through a process of natural selection over thousand of years, our minds and bodies have developed techniques for rewarding actions that multiply and sustain humanity. Yet our minds and bodies are not ready for the supernormal stimulus that is bigger, brighter, colourful, edgier and more shocking than the one we have now. We are attracted proportional to the degree of how far the outlier is from our individual normal. It can be two dimensional clip - and a muted one at that - we will get aroused. Look at the same clip again and again and you won’t be. You just moved your red line close to the outlier and in no time you will enclose it in your normal consciousness. It is natural and it is so that you can multiply and grow this human race. In real life there are checks and balances in place so you take a break and go away do something else. With internet porn you there are no such checks and balances and you are living in a virtual harem!</p>
|
||||
<p>When we took a ‘peep’ at internet porn the first time, a few images were titillating but most were disgusting, causing you to avert your eyes away. Like you would if had accidentally glanced a feeding mother’s breast. And some of us are even revolted with what they saw when the star reminded them of someone dear to their heart or a scene which recalled their own instance of being the victim. Some don’t feel like it to browse and masturbate at the same time. It may be hard to believe for you but the non-PMOs, who don’t PMO after their first time, are the lucky ones. They actually decided that it was not their cup of tea. It must be hard for you to believe but stay with me.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not ? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h3 id="are-pmoers-mentally-weak"><strong>Are PMOers Mentally Weak?</strong></h3>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1831,13 +1831,13 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
<p>As I said previously, the problem is not explaining why it is easy to stop; it is explaining why it is difficult. In fact, the real problem is explaining scientifically why anybody does it even after getting the insights on the neurological damages of addictions not limited to porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The whole business of porn is an extraordinary enigma. One of the reasons we get on to it is because of the thousands of people are already into it, about 35% of the population approximately. Yet every one of them wishes he or she had not started in the first place, telling us that life is like driving in second gear. We cannot quite believe they are not enjoying it. We associate it with freedom or being “sex-educated” and work hard to become hooked ourselves. We then spend the rest of our lives telling others not to do it and trying to kick the habit ourselves.</p>
|
||||
<p>We also spend the rest of our lives feeling hopeless and miserable. Time spent on porn can accumulate to a large percentage of our life in this planet! What do we do with that amount of time spent? We ‘educate’ ourselves with supranormal<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> ‘material’ that makes us stupidly prefer and childishly long for these cold images - even when warm real ones are available. By the constant surge and drop of dopamine induced by PMO, we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of irritability, anger, frustration, stress, fatigue<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup>, PIED, hypofrontality etc. In short, it is a lifetime of slavery. It is logically and intuitively clear that amative sex (physical touch, feel, voice etc.) is the best part of sex and is even better (if Karezza<sup id="fnref:3"><a href="#fn:3" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">3</a></sup> is practised, although not necessary for the current purposes) than the propagative (orgasm) part, except when children are desired. So, when we use porn in the absence of the best part of sex we feel miserable and guilty.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it ? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>The PMOer despises himself, every time he has an unreliable erection, a fading penetration, reading about PIED and other stuff on the YBOP forum, every time he could not pull himself up to exercise after a daytime PMO, every PMO behind his or her trustfully asleep partner’s back, every time he sees his tired face and lifeless eyes in the restroom mirror.</p>
|
||||
<p>Having to go through life with these awful black shadows at the back of his mind, what does he get out of it? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Pleasure? Enjoyment? Relaxation? A prop? A boost? All illusions, unless you consider the wearing of tight shoes to enjoy the removal of them as some sort of pleasure!</p>
|
||||
<p>The real problem is trying to explain not only why PMOers find it difficult to stop but why anybody does it at all after knowing about brain neuroplasticity. You are probably thinking: “That&rsquo;s all very well. I know this, but once you are hooked on these things it is very difficult to stop.” But why is it so difficult, and why do we have to do it? Addicts of PMO search for the answer to these questions all of their lives. Some say it is because of the powerful withdrawal symptoms. In fact, the actual withdrawal symptoms from porn are so mild (see Chapter 6) that PMOers should know about smokers who have lived and died without ever realizing they are drug addicts.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre ? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Enjoyment has nothing to do with it. I enjoy lobster but I never got to the stage where I had to have lobsters everyday and multiple times like they are hanging round my neck. With other things in life we enjoy them whilst we are doing them but we don&rsquo;t sit feeling deprived when we are not. Some search for deep psychological reasons, the “Freudian Syndrome,” or “the child at the mother&rsquo;s breast.” Really it is just the reverse.</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you ?</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you?</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say:</p>
|
||||
<ul>
|
||||
<li>“It is educational!” So, when is your graduation?</li>
|
||||
|
|
@ -2068,7 +2068,7 @@ the world would also see the light and adopt my method.</li>
|
|||
<p>If you are expecting me to inform you of the terrible health issues that PMO addicts risk, that they are susceptible to be affected by PIED (porn induced erectile disfunction), unreliable arousals, fading penetration, loss of interest in real partners,loss of control over themselves, loss of relationships, that it is a filthy, disgusting habit and that <em>YOU</em> are a stupid, spineless, weak-willed jellyfish, then I must disappoint you. Those tactics never helped me to quit and if they were going to help you, you would already have quit.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our Method, which I shall refer to as EASYPEASY doesn&rsquo;t work that way. Some of the things that I am about to say, you might find difficult to believe. However by the time you&rsquo;ve finished reading the book, you&rsquo;ll not only believe them, but wonder how you could ever have been brainwashed into believing otherwise.</p>
|
||||
<p>There is a common misapprehension that we choose to watch porn. PMO addicts ( yes addicts) no more choose to do that than alcoholics choose to become alcoholics, or heroin addicts choose to become heroin addicts. It is true that we choose to boot up the laptop, fire up the browser and visit our favourite online harem<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> tube sites. I occasionally choose to go to the cinema, but I certainly didn&rsquo;t choose to spend my whole life in the cinema theatre. The curiosity and my nature took me there but I would not have done that if I had known it would addict me and cause me my health, happiness and relationships. Only if I had heard about PIED on my first visit to that porn site?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day ? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem ?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem?</p>
|
||||
<p>Like every other PMOer, you have been lured into the most sinister subtle trap that man and nature have combined to devise. There is not a parent, brother, sister on this planet, whether they be PMOer themselves or not, that likes the thought of their children using porn and PMO to cope and for pleasure. This means that all PMOers wish they had never started. Not surprising really, no one needs porn to enjoy life or cope with stress before they get hooked.</p>
|
||||
<p>At the same time all PMOers wish to continue to PMO. After all, no one forces us to turn on the incognito mode of the browser, whether we understand the reason or not, it is only PMOers themselves that decide to knock on the doors of the online harems.</p>
|
||||
<p>If there were a magic button that the PMOers could press to wake up the following morning as if they never accessed their very first tube site&hellip;. the only PMO addicts there would be tomorrow morning would be the youngsters who are still at the experimental stage. The only thing that prevents us from quitting is: FEAR!</p>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -829,7 +829,7 @@ when you were a PMOer. Just think, how can you possibly cure an addict of addict
|
|||
</ol>
|
||||
<p>Once that little monster leaves your body the awful feeling of insecurity ends. Your confidence returns, together with a marvellous feeling of self-respect. You obtain the assurance to take control of your life, not only in your other habits but also in all other ways. This is one of the many great advantages of being free from any addiction.</p>
|
||||
<p>As I have said, the ‘compartment’ myth is due to one of many tricks that the little monster plays with your mind. In fact, these tricks do not make it easier to stop, they make it harder. The PMOer is therefore left with a permanent hunger that he can never satisfy. This is why many PMOers turn to cigarettes, heavy drinking or even harder drugs in order to satisfy the void.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster ? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
</description>
|
||||
</item>
|
||||
|
||||
|
|
@ -1296,7 +1296,7 @@ Get out of the habit of envying PMOers and start seeing them as the miserable, p
|
|||
</blockquote>
|
||||
<p>I can understand why the ED and the risks of ruining one’s mental health didn&rsquo;t help me to quit. I could cope with the former and block my mind to the latter. As you are already aware, my method is not to frighten you into quitting but the complete opposite - to make you realize just how more enjoyable your life will be when you have escaped.</p>
|
||||
<p>However, I do believe that if I could have seen what was happening inside my brain, this would have helped me to quit. Now I&rsquo;m not referring to the shock technique of showing a PMOer the effect of the hidden attribute of internet porn on the reward circuit of the brain. It was obvious to me from my unreliable arousals, fading penetrations, lack of energy, unemotional sex (as in just a muscle twitch), hit-seek escalations of porn search for novelty and shock that something is not going right. None of these are catastrophic for me as I have trained myself in cognitive behavioural techniques as discussed before but I did experience them quite often enough. Practising CBT/REBT gave me enough grounding and stability to look at my addiction in a different and better way than I’d have if I were not aware of the cognitive biases. Provided I kept functioning, even at a mediocre level, they were less of an embarrassment than a lost tooth - at least nobody could see my mind.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice ? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>Many researchers and doctors are now relating various mental health problems in addition to the physiological ones caused by internet porn and PMO in general. This is no surprise to me. The mainstream medical world has laboured that PMO has never been scientifically proven to be the direct cause of the issues reported by self-confessing individuals. Admitting one’s sexual inability in public is such a shame triggering event, why would anyone do that unless they are really concerned? And probably many have found the cause and have eliminated it. This book is going to help you to get rid of it and also become a happy ex PMOer. No porn whatsoever, no porn aided masturbation. And of course no unnecessary orgasms. The only aid will be the touch, smell and voice of your partner. Like whole wheat bread after a well developed appetite, you will produce enough juices to break down the hard bread and it comes as a beautiful refreshment. No high fructose corn syrup injected fake food. The evidence is so overwhelming as not to need proof. No one ever scientifically proved to me exactly why, when I bang my thumb with a hammer, it hurts. I soon got the message.</p>
|
||||
<p>I must emphasize that I am not a doctor but just like the hammer and the thumb, it soon became obvious to me that the periods of my life outside of sex that were marked by low levels of irritation tolerance, lack of energy, temper, moody thoughts, zoning out of social scenes etc. were directly related to my masturbation and especially the supernormal stimulus of IP<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup>. However, I truly believe that the greatest hazard that IP causes to our health is the gradual and progressive deterioration of our sex life caused by super-substitutes. The novelty, shock, variety in size and nature of internet porn can slowly take away the magic of the real sex. Worse, the RC<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup> reward circuits are flooding unnaturally and at high abnormal levels so that they close up the receptors and also diminish any potency and effectiveness of normal de-stressors that work in the RC. This predisposes one to be depressed and become needy to lot more other ‘crutches’ of life such as cigarettes and alcohol or even causing the host to think of committing suicide. Even the real vagina will not be a match for the death grip of masturbation - and the little monster is kept alive.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our lives are ‘blessed’ with challenges – yes, ‘blessed’- they are needed to keep us strong and make us better. If our nervous systems is pre-disposed to making a molehill out of a mountain it will seek a ‘fix. When it seeks a hit or a mountain out of a molehill when it interfaces with reality then is it worth it? Our body and our brain is designed to make use of optimal levels of these brain chemicals. I don’t think a man who fails in satisfying a woman should consider himself worthless.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1423,7 +1423,7 @@ pleasure.”</em></p>
|
|||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h2 id="women-and-porn"><strong>Women And Porn</strong></h2>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn ? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>Porn and internet porn does not help your sex life; it destroys it totally. Having to hide your internet footprints, trying to delete your history, fearing accidental exposure to your boyfriend or kids, body pains, doubtful symptoms, fighting self doubts, arguing with yourself about your responsibilities in the ill effects of your addiction&hellip; well, why do you want to put yourself in such a bad situation?</p>
|
||||
<p>Not only is there nothing to give up but there are marvellous positive gains to be had. When PMOers contemplate quitting they tend to concentrate on health and virility. These are obviously valid and important issues but I personally believe the greatest gains from stopping are psychological:</p>
|
||||
<ol>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1733,7 +1733,7 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
</div>
|
||||
<p>Through a process of natural selection over thousand of years, our minds and bodies have developed techniques for rewarding actions that multiply and sustain humanity. Yet our minds and bodies are not ready for the supernormal stimulus that is bigger, brighter, colourful, edgier and more shocking than the one we have now. We are attracted proportional to the degree of how far the outlier is from our individual normal. It can be two dimensional clip - and a muted one at that - we will get aroused. Look at the same clip again and again and you won’t be. You just moved your red line close to the outlier and in no time you will enclose it in your normal consciousness. It is natural and it is so that you can multiply and grow this human race. In real life there are checks and balances in place so you take a break and go away do something else. With internet porn you there are no such checks and balances and you are living in a virtual harem!</p>
|
||||
<p>When we took a ‘peep’ at internet porn the first time, a few images were titillating but most were disgusting, causing you to avert your eyes away. Like you would if had accidentally glanced a feeding mother’s breast. And some of us are even revolted with what they saw when the star reminded them of someone dear to their heart or a scene which recalled their own instance of being the victim. Some don’t feel like it to browse and masturbate at the same time. It may be hard to believe for you but the non-PMOs, who don’t PMO after their first time, are the lucky ones. They actually decided that it was not their cup of tea. It must be hard for you to believe but stay with me.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not ? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h3 id="are-pmoers-mentally-weak"><strong>Are PMOers Mentally Weak?</strong></h3>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1831,13 +1831,13 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
<p>As I said previously, the problem is not explaining why it is easy to stop; it is explaining why it is difficult. In fact, the real problem is explaining scientifically why anybody does it even after getting the insights on the neurological damages of addictions not limited to porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The whole business of porn is an extraordinary enigma. One of the reasons we get on to it is because of the thousands of people are already into it, about 35% of the population approximately. Yet every one of them wishes he or she had not started in the first place, telling us that life is like driving in second gear. We cannot quite believe they are not enjoying it. We associate it with freedom or being “sex-educated” and work hard to become hooked ourselves. We then spend the rest of our lives telling others not to do it and trying to kick the habit ourselves.</p>
|
||||
<p>We also spend the rest of our lives feeling hopeless and miserable. Time spent on porn can accumulate to a large percentage of our life in this planet! What do we do with that amount of time spent? We ‘educate’ ourselves with supranormal<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> ‘material’ that makes us stupidly prefer and childishly long for these cold images - even when warm real ones are available. By the constant surge and drop of dopamine induced by PMO, we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of irritability, anger, frustration, stress, fatigue<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup>, PIED, hypofrontality etc. In short, it is a lifetime of slavery. It is logically and intuitively clear that amative sex (physical touch, feel, voice etc.) is the best part of sex and is even better (if Karezza<sup id="fnref:3"><a href="#fn:3" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">3</a></sup> is practised, although not necessary for the current purposes) than the propagative (orgasm) part, except when children are desired. So, when we use porn in the absence of the best part of sex we feel miserable and guilty.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it ? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>The PMOer despises himself, every time he has an unreliable erection, a fading penetration, reading about PIED and other stuff on the YBOP forum, every time he could not pull himself up to exercise after a daytime PMO, every PMO behind his or her trustfully asleep partner’s back, every time he sees his tired face and lifeless eyes in the restroom mirror.</p>
|
||||
<p>Having to go through life with these awful black shadows at the back of his mind, what does he get out of it? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Pleasure? Enjoyment? Relaxation? A prop? A boost? All illusions, unless you consider the wearing of tight shoes to enjoy the removal of them as some sort of pleasure!</p>
|
||||
<p>The real problem is trying to explain not only why PMOers find it difficult to stop but why anybody does it at all after knowing about brain neuroplasticity. You are probably thinking: “That&rsquo;s all very well. I know this, but once you are hooked on these things it is very difficult to stop.” But why is it so difficult, and why do we have to do it? Addicts of PMO search for the answer to these questions all of their lives. Some say it is because of the powerful withdrawal symptoms. In fact, the actual withdrawal symptoms from porn are so mild (see Chapter 6) that PMOers should know about smokers who have lived and died without ever realizing they are drug addicts.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre ? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Enjoyment has nothing to do with it. I enjoy lobster but I never got to the stage where I had to have lobsters everyday and multiple times like they are hanging round my neck. With other things in life we enjoy them whilst we are doing them but we don&rsquo;t sit feeling deprived when we are not. Some search for deep psychological reasons, the “Freudian Syndrome,” or “the child at the mother&rsquo;s breast.” Really it is just the reverse.</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you ?</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you?</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say:</p>
|
||||
<ul>
|
||||
<li>“It is educational!” So, when is your graduation?</li>
|
||||
|
|
@ -2068,7 +2068,7 @@ the world would also see the light and adopt my method.</li>
|
|||
<p>If you are expecting me to inform you of the terrible health issues that PMO addicts risk, that they are susceptible to be affected by PIED (porn induced erectile disfunction), unreliable arousals, fading penetration, loss of interest in real partners,loss of control over themselves, loss of relationships, that it is a filthy, disgusting habit and that <em>YOU</em> are a stupid, spineless, weak-willed jellyfish, then I must disappoint you. Those tactics never helped me to quit and if they were going to help you, you would already have quit.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our Method, which I shall refer to as EASYPEASY doesn&rsquo;t work that way. Some of the things that I am about to say, you might find difficult to believe. However by the time you&rsquo;ve finished reading the book, you&rsquo;ll not only believe them, but wonder how you could ever have been brainwashed into believing otherwise.</p>
|
||||
<p>There is a common misapprehension that we choose to watch porn. PMO addicts ( yes addicts) no more choose to do that than alcoholics choose to become alcoholics, or heroin addicts choose to become heroin addicts. It is true that we choose to boot up the laptop, fire up the browser and visit our favourite online harem<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> tube sites. I occasionally choose to go to the cinema, but I certainly didn&rsquo;t choose to spend my whole life in the cinema theatre. The curiosity and my nature took me there but I would not have done that if I had known it would addict me and cause me my health, happiness and relationships. Only if I had heard about PIED on my first visit to that porn site?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day ? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem ?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem?</p>
|
||||
<p>Like every other PMOer, you have been lured into the most sinister subtle trap that man and nature have combined to devise. There is not a parent, brother, sister on this planet, whether they be PMOer themselves or not, that likes the thought of their children using porn and PMO to cope and for pleasure. This means that all PMOers wish they had never started. Not surprising really, no one needs porn to enjoy life or cope with stress before they get hooked.</p>
|
||||
<p>At the same time all PMOers wish to continue to PMO. After all, no one forces us to turn on the incognito mode of the browser, whether we understand the reason or not, it is only PMOers themselves that decide to knock on the doors of the online harems.</p>
|
||||
<p>If there were a magic button that the PMOers could press to wake up the following morning as if they never accessed their very first tube site&hellip;. the only PMO addicts there would be tomorrow morning would be the youngsters who are still at the experimental stage. The only thing that prevents us from quitting is: FEAR!</p>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
@ -829,7 +829,7 @@ when you were a PMOer. Just think, how can you possibly cure an addict of addict
|
|||
</ol>
|
||||
<p>Once that little monster leaves your body the awful feeling of insecurity ends. Your confidence returns, together with a marvellous feeling of self-respect. You obtain the assurance to take control of your life, not only in your other habits but also in all other ways. This is one of the many great advantages of being free from any addiction.</p>
|
||||
<p>As I have said, the ‘compartment’ myth is due to one of many tricks that the little monster plays with your mind. In fact, these tricks do not make it easier to stop, they make it harder. The PMOer is therefore left with a permanent hunger that he can never satisfy. This is why many PMOers turn to cigarettes, heavy drinking or even harder drugs in order to satisfy the void.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster ? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
<p>I had suggested watching porn with one of my partners. But eventually I noticed it did not enhance my arousal at all. The sex was not better. I realized that it actually diminished my attraction towards her. We humans are rating animals - we always self rate and other rate. I am sure she rated me against the male porn start too. Why take chances? Do you want Brad Pitt in your bedroom, even if he is in a poster? No one man or woman can match a harem where each ‘experience’ is acted, scripted and directed by professionals and at the ready 24 hours a day.</p>
|
||||
</description>
|
||||
</item>
|
||||
|
||||
|
|
@ -1296,7 +1296,7 @@ Get out of the habit of envying PMOers and start seeing them as the miserable, p
|
|||
</blockquote>
|
||||
<p>I can understand why the ED and the risks of ruining one’s mental health didn&rsquo;t help me to quit. I could cope with the former and block my mind to the latter. As you are already aware, my method is not to frighten you into quitting but the complete opposite - to make you realize just how more enjoyable your life will be when you have escaped.</p>
|
||||
<p>However, I do believe that if I could have seen what was happening inside my brain, this would have helped me to quit. Now I&rsquo;m not referring to the shock technique of showing a PMOer the effect of the hidden attribute of internet porn on the reward circuit of the brain. It was obvious to me from my unreliable arousals, fading penetrations, lack of energy, unemotional sex (as in just a muscle twitch), hit-seek escalations of porn search for novelty and shock that something is not going right. None of these are catastrophic for me as I have trained myself in cognitive behavioural techniques as discussed before but I did experience them quite often enough. Practising CBT/REBT gave me enough grounding and stability to look at my addiction in a different and better way than I’d have if I were not aware of the cognitive biases. Provided I kept functioning, even at a mediocre level, they were less of an embarrassment than a lost tooth - at least nobody could see my mind.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice ? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>What I am referring to is the progressive gunging-up of our reward circuits with excessive stimulation, making them incapable of handling the normal stresses of life. Closing up of dopamine and opioids receptors does not help me in enjoying my life with enough vigour. Porn and masturbation has replaced the natural sexual appetite, like a candy bar replacing real food. The brain has no idea to differentiate one from the other. I don&rsquo;t like the thought of a virus in my smart phone or my laptop. Could you imagine buying the latest one of these gadgets and letting a virus to run every line of the software code but repeat it thrice? That&rsquo;s what we effectively do to our bodies when we become PMOers.</p>
|
||||
<p>Many researchers and doctors are now relating various mental health problems in addition to the physiological ones caused by internet porn and PMO in general. This is no surprise to me. The mainstream medical world has laboured that PMO has never been scientifically proven to be the direct cause of the issues reported by self-confessing individuals. Admitting one’s sexual inability in public is such a shame triggering event, why would anyone do that unless they are really concerned? And probably many have found the cause and have eliminated it. This book is going to help you to get rid of it and also become a happy ex PMOer. No porn whatsoever, no porn aided masturbation. And of course no unnecessary orgasms. The only aid will be the touch, smell and voice of your partner. Like whole wheat bread after a well developed appetite, you will produce enough juices to break down the hard bread and it comes as a beautiful refreshment. No high fructose corn syrup injected fake food. The evidence is so overwhelming as not to need proof. No one ever scientifically proved to me exactly why, when I bang my thumb with a hammer, it hurts. I soon got the message.</p>
|
||||
<p>I must emphasize that I am not a doctor but just like the hammer and the thumb, it soon became obvious to me that the periods of my life outside of sex that were marked by low levels of irritation tolerance, lack of energy, temper, moody thoughts, zoning out of social scenes etc. were directly related to my masturbation and especially the supernormal stimulus of IP<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup>. However, I truly believe that the greatest hazard that IP causes to our health is the gradual and progressive deterioration of our sex life caused by super-substitutes. The novelty, shock, variety in size and nature of internet porn can slowly take away the magic of the real sex. Worse, the RC<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup> reward circuits are flooding unnaturally and at high abnormal levels so that they close up the receptors and also diminish any potency and effectiveness of normal de-stressors that work in the RC. This predisposes one to be depressed and become needy to lot more other ‘crutches’ of life such as cigarettes and alcohol or even causing the host to think of committing suicide. Even the real vagina will not be a match for the death grip of masturbation - and the little monster is kept alive.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our lives are ‘blessed’ with challenges – yes, ‘blessed’- they are needed to keep us strong and make us better. If our nervous systems is pre-disposed to making a molehill out of a mountain it will seek a ‘fix. When it seeks a hit or a mountain out of a molehill when it interfaces with reality then is it worth it? Our body and our brain is designed to make use of optimal levels of these brain chemicals. I don’t think a man who fails in satisfying a woman should consider himself worthless.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1423,7 +1423,7 @@ pleasure.”</em></p>
|
|||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h2 id="women-and-porn"><strong>Women And Porn</strong></h2>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn ? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The greatest evidence of the fear that porn instils is in its effect on women. Practically all women are fastidious about their personal appearance. They wouldn&rsquo;t dream of appearing at a social function not immaculately turned out and smelling beautiful. So why would they fall for internet porn? The traps were set as either a control trap (I can give up when I want) or an educational trap, or a freedom trap (I am entitled). Feminism has freed women from all the bad patriarchal rules of the past but they still need to be aware of supranormal stimulus such as internet porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>Porn and internet porn does not help your sex life; it destroys it totally. Having to hide your internet footprints, trying to delete your history, fearing accidental exposure to your boyfriend or kids, body pains, doubtful symptoms, fighting self doubts, arguing with yourself about your responsibilities in the ill effects of your addiction&hellip; well, why do you want to put yourself in such a bad situation?</p>
|
||||
<p>Not only is there nothing to give up but there are marvellous positive gains to be had. When PMOers contemplate quitting they tend to concentrate on health and virility. These are obviously valid and important issues but I personally believe the greatest gains from stopping are psychological:</p>
|
||||
<ol>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1733,7 +1733,7 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
</div>
|
||||
<p>Through a process of natural selection over thousand of years, our minds and bodies have developed techniques for rewarding actions that multiply and sustain humanity. Yet our minds and bodies are not ready for the supernormal stimulus that is bigger, brighter, colourful, edgier and more shocking than the one we have now. We are attracted proportional to the degree of how far the outlier is from our individual normal. It can be two dimensional clip - and a muted one at that - we will get aroused. Look at the same clip again and again and you won’t be. You just moved your red line close to the outlier and in no time you will enclose it in your normal consciousness. It is natural and it is so that you can multiply and grow this human race. In real life there are checks and balances in place so you take a break and go away do something else. With internet porn you there are no such checks and balances and you are living in a virtual harem!</p>
|
||||
<p>When we took a ‘peep’ at internet porn the first time, a few images were titillating but most were disgusting, causing you to avert your eyes away. Like you would if had accidentally glanced a feeding mother’s breast. And some of us are even revolted with what they saw when the star reminded them of someone dear to their heart or a scene which recalled their own instance of being the victim. Some don’t feel like it to browse and masturbate at the same time. It may be hard to believe for you but the non-PMOs, who don’t PMO after their first time, are the lucky ones. They actually decided that it was not their cup of tea. It must be hard for you to believe but stay with me.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not ? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<p>How many of us don’t visit brothels - even when you are far from home? Why not? It’s not the social stigma? How many of us did not bring home a bottle on your way back from work - even after a hard day? Why not? You ‘deserve’ it after that big deal you made? You just decided, after your first instance, that it’s not your cup of tea. That&rsquo;s all.</p>
|
||||
<div style="text-align: center;">
|
||||
<h3 id="are-pmoers-mentally-weak"><strong>Are PMOers Mentally Weak?</strong></h3>
|
||||
</div>
|
||||
|
|
@ -1831,13 +1831,13 @@ became addicted. However, the satisfaction is only temporary because in order to
|
|||
<p>As I said previously, the problem is not explaining why it is easy to stop; it is explaining why it is difficult. In fact, the real problem is explaining scientifically why anybody does it even after getting the insights on the neurological damages of addictions not limited to porn.</p>
|
||||
<p>The whole business of porn is an extraordinary enigma. One of the reasons we get on to it is because of the thousands of people are already into it, about 35% of the population approximately. Yet every one of them wishes he or she had not started in the first place, telling us that life is like driving in second gear. We cannot quite believe they are not enjoying it. We associate it with freedom or being “sex-educated” and work hard to become hooked ourselves. We then spend the rest of our lives telling others not to do it and trying to kick the habit ourselves.</p>
|
||||
<p>We also spend the rest of our lives feeling hopeless and miserable. Time spent on porn can accumulate to a large percentage of our life in this planet! What do we do with that amount of time spent? We ‘educate’ ourselves with supranormal<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> ‘material’ that makes us stupidly prefer and childishly long for these cold images - even when warm real ones are available. By the constant surge and drop of dopamine induced by PMO, we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of irritability, anger, frustration, stress, fatigue<sup id="fnref:2"><a href="#fn:2" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">2</a></sup>, PIED, hypofrontality etc. In short, it is a lifetime of slavery. It is logically and intuitively clear that amative sex (physical touch, feel, voice etc.) is the best part of sex and is even better (if Karezza<sup id="fnref:3"><a href="#fn:3" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">3</a></sup> is practised, although not necessary for the current purposes) than the propagative (orgasm) part, except when children are desired. So, when we use porn in the absence of the best part of sex we feel miserable and guilty.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it ? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>In fact, all the reading about internet pornography&rsquo;s addictive capabilities and it’s destructive effects here and in other online sites makes us even more nervous and hopeless. When we are trying to cut down or stop, we end up feeling deprived. We wish we didn&rsquo;t have to. What sort of hobby is it that when you are doing it you wish you weren&rsquo;t, and when you are not doing it you crave for it? A lifetime of an otherwise intelligent, rational human being going through life in contempt.</p>
|
||||
<p>The PMOer despises himself, every time he has an unreliable erection, a fading penetration, reading about PIED and other stuff on the YBOP forum, every time he could not pull himself up to exercise after a daytime PMO, every PMO behind his or her trustfully asleep partner’s back, every time he sees his tired face and lifeless eyes in the restroom mirror.</p>
|
||||
<p>Having to go through life with these awful black shadows at the back of his mind, what does he get out of it? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Pleasure? Enjoyment? Relaxation? A prop? A boost? All illusions, unless you consider the wearing of tight shoes to enjoy the removal of them as some sort of pleasure!</p>
|
||||
<p>The real problem is trying to explain not only why PMOers find it difficult to stop but why anybody does it at all after knowing about brain neuroplasticity. You are probably thinking: “That&rsquo;s all very well. I know this, but once you are hooked on these things it is very difficult to stop.” But why is it so difficult, and why do we have to do it? Addicts of PMO search for the answer to these questions all of their lives. Some say it is because of the powerful withdrawal symptoms. In fact, the actual withdrawal symptoms from porn are so mild (see Chapter 6) that PMOers should know about smokers who have lived and died without ever realizing they are drug addicts.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre ? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say internet porn is free and hence humankind should claim this biological bonanza. It is NOT. It is addictive and acts like any other drug. Ask a PMOer who swears that he only enjoys safe playboy type erotica and that he could always restrict himself only to this soft genre? If he is absolutely honest - he would tell you about the many times when he had unwittingly crossed the line. Otherwise good PMOers would rather use ‘unsafe’ hardcore stuff, rationalizing it, than left with nothing at all.</p>
|
||||
<p>Enjoyment has nothing to do with it. I enjoy lobster but I never got to the stage where I had to have lobsters everyday and multiple times like they are hanging round my neck. With other things in life we enjoy them whilst we are doing them but we don&rsquo;t sit feeling deprived when we are not. Some search for deep psychological reasons, the “Freudian Syndrome,” or “the child at the mother&rsquo;s breast.” Really it is just the reverse.</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you ?</p>
|
||||
<p>The ‘usual’ reason why we start PMO is to show we are grown up and mature. Some think it is the reverse, the macho effect of “doing what boys do” or in some cases, “let me show I am a tomboy girl,” to rattle my conservative family. Again, this argument has no substance. Internet porn provides easy escalation (outrageous and shocking clips just a click away), desensitization (same clips don’t do it any more) and all this within the high reward no risk settings. The science fiction story lines, the fake “amateurs,” the “real life” clips etc. should make any average PMOer discover pretty soon that it is all an illusion. What a PMOer should also understand is that after eating at restaurants every day the home food will never appeal your taste buds at all. Yes, the food is free and is tasty - but does it nourish you?</p>
|
||||
<p>Some say:</p>
|
||||
<ul>
|
||||
<li>“It is educational!” So, when is your graduation?</li>
|
||||
|
|
@ -2068,7 +2068,7 @@ the world would also see the light and adopt my method.</li>
|
|||
<p>If you are expecting me to inform you of the terrible health issues that PMO addicts risk, that they are susceptible to be affected by PIED (porn induced erectile disfunction), unreliable arousals, fading penetration, loss of interest in real partners,loss of control over themselves, loss of relationships, that it is a filthy, disgusting habit and that <em>YOU</em> are a stupid, spineless, weak-willed jellyfish, then I must disappoint you. Those tactics never helped me to quit and if they were going to help you, you would already have quit.</p>
|
||||
<p>Our Method, which I shall refer to as EASYPEASY doesn&rsquo;t work that way. Some of the things that I am about to say, you might find difficult to believe. However by the time you&rsquo;ve finished reading the book, you&rsquo;ll not only believe them, but wonder how you could ever have been brainwashed into believing otherwise.</p>
|
||||
<p>There is a common misapprehension that we choose to watch porn. PMO addicts ( yes addicts) no more choose to do that than alcoholics choose to become alcoholics, or heroin addicts choose to become heroin addicts. It is true that we choose to boot up the laptop, fire up the browser and visit our favourite online harem<sup id="fnref:1"><a href="#fn:1" class="footnote-ref" role="doc-noteref">1</a></sup> tube sites. I occasionally choose to go to the cinema, but I certainly didn&rsquo;t choose to spend my whole life in the cinema theatre. The curiosity and my nature took me there but I would not have done that if I had known it would addict me and cause me my health, happiness and relationships. Only if I had heard about PIED on my first visit to that porn site?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day ? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem ?</p>
|
||||
<p>Please reflect on your life. Did you ever make the ‘positive’ decision that at certain times in your life, you couldn&rsquo;t enjoy a good night sleep or pass a night after a hard day at work without surfing for porn, or that you couldn&rsquo;t concentrate or handle stress without masturbating to orgasm at the end of the day? At what stage did you decide that you needed PMO, not just for lonely nights, but that you needed to have them permanently in your life, and felt insecure, even panic-stricken without online porn which I will call your online harem?</p>
|
||||
<p>Like every other PMOer, you have been lured into the most sinister subtle trap that man and nature have combined to devise. There is not a parent, brother, sister on this planet, whether they be PMOer themselves or not, that likes the thought of their children using porn and PMO to cope and for pleasure. This means that all PMOers wish they had never started. Not surprising really, no one needs porn to enjoy life or cope with stress before they get hooked.</p>
|
||||
<p>At the same time all PMOers wish to continue to PMO. After all, no one forces us to turn on the incognito mode of the browser, whether we understand the reason or not, it is only PMOers themselves that decide to knock on the doors of the online harems.</p>
|
||||
<p>If there were a magic button that the PMOers could press to wake up the following morning as if they never accessed their very first tube site&hellip;. the only PMO addicts there would be tomorrow morning would be the youngsters who are still at the experimental stage. The only thing that prevents us from quitting is: FEAR!</p>
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
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Reference in a new issue